Magic Rocks? Why The Hell Not?
by Purple Karma
Summary: Issei finds the Reality Stone. Blood will be spilt, bodies and panties will drop, and breasts will be set free as the world is turned on its ass. (Contains elements from Marvel Comics.)
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One: Caught in a Landslide, No escape from Reality**

**Summary**: Issei finds the Reality Stone. The world is turned on its ass.

* * *

Issei knows he probably shouldn't touch the glowing red rock but does so anyway.

Can you blame him, though? I mean he's a teenager who's obsessed with breasts of all things for Christ's sake! Since when has he ever listened to common sense?

So yes. You can be damn-well sure he's going to touch the mysterious glowing red rock that just so happened to be in his backyard. Consequences be damned.

Picking it up, Issei notices that besides its jagged, metallic surface and its hellish red glow, it looks completely harmless. It's as light as a feather, smooth to the touch and is no bigger than any common rock that one would find on the side of the road. Though despite its innocent appearance Issei could faintly sense some kind of unknown energy pulsing within its tiny core.

_**[Be wary, boy.] **_A deep and baritone voice warned from the deepest recesses of his mind. _**[That stone holds a kind of power that far outclasses my own. Though why it is in your backyard of all places is a mystery that I'm not sure I want to solve.]**_

Oh, yeah. He also has a giant fucking dragon in his head. Apparently God that it'd be funny to stick the creature from the Shrek movies into an unborn infant's body. Good thing He was already dead or Issei would've had a few choice words with Him about the finer arts of creating a good punchline from a really bad pun. 'Cause he didn't find that shit funny at all.

Eh, whatever. Moral of the story is that he's got a dragon in his head along with something called a 'Sacred Gear' that gives him power boosts like free samples at a Cosco. Yeah, it makes about as much sense as a vegan working at McDonalds but he'll take what he can get.

Back to the glowing rock.

Issei flicked the small rock into the air before stuffing it into his pocket. Ddraig – that's the dragon's name, by the way – made a noise of indignation but he ignored it in favor of heading up to his room. Locking the door behind him, Issei walked over to his bedside nightstand, opened the drawer and tossed the red stone inside without a care in the world.

_**[Boy! Did you not hear what I just-]**_

The dragon immediately ceased his rant when Issei replaced the stone with a sport's sock and _very_ large bottle of Vaseline.

_**[Oh, no. No no no no no, please no-]**_

Throwing himself on his bed, Issei pulled out his laptop and clicked on one of his many favorite links.

Despite being in his mind, the sound of Issei's belt buckle coming undone nearly deafened the dragon.

_**[ISSEI-]**_

He cut off the link and began pouring a monumental amount of lotion into the sock just as a video clip of two topless women making out and rubbing their large bare breasts together came onto the screen.

Though that wouldn't be the only thing _coming_ onto the screen.

Issei, frankly, couldn't give two shits and a popsicle what the glowing rock was. Tonight was Lesbian MILF Monday and he would be damned if some weird looking pebble interrupted his precious alone time.

* * *

Issei lazily twirled the glowing stone between his fingers as he entered the school grounds.

It wasn't even eight in the morning and Ddraig still had yet to stop crying.

_**[Why?!] **_The lizard moaned as his sobs got louder. _**[Out of the billions of humans on this Gods forsaken planet, WHY did I have to get stuck inside such a deplorable and perverted whelp like you?!]**_

"Because God has a shitty sense of humor?" Issei questioned nonchalantly as he walked down the hallway. He pointedly ignored how all of the female students gave him a wide berth and shot him looks of absolute disgust and loathing. "Or maybe it's because the universe just loves screwing with you. Anyway can you please stop crying? It's starting to give me a headache."

Some of the students looked at him as if he was insane; which might've not been too far from the point. He _was_ technically talking to himself, after all.

_**[I'll stop crying as soon as YOU stop mindlessly pleasuring yourself to cheap pornography!] **_The dragon yelled with disgust. Seriously, how has this kid not run dry yet?! Better question is, _how_ was his laptop still even functioning with the ridiculous amount of semen that he's drowned it in?!

"Then I guess I'll just have to get used to you crying because that will _never_ happen." Issei said as he sauntered into the classroom.

Just as he expected, pretty much every student either glared at him or stood as far away from him as they possibly could. And like always he simply shrugged them off. Walking towards his desk – which luckily for him was at the very back of the class and closest to the window – he dropped his schoolbag on the ground and planted himself in his seat. He continued to twirl the stone between his fingers even as the teacher entered the room and began taking roll call.

Drowning the man out, Issei caught the stone in his palm and took a closer look at it. Despite that Ddraig may have thought, he hadn't completely ignored the dragon's warning. Thanks to the heightened senses he received from Ddraig, he was also able to detect the energy that was held within the stone. Just barely though. Ddraig once told him that if you couldn't sense someone's power level, they were either dead or simply too powerful _to_ sense. The fact that Ddraig said that the stone's power surpassed his own was definitely a cause for concern.

He was so engrossed with staring at the small rock that he didn't notice the teacher called out his name.

"Hyoudou!"

"Here, Sensei!" Issei called out with a hand instantly raised into the air. This earned him a mocking laugh from everyone in the room.

"Pay attention next time, Hyoudou!" The teacher snapped before moving onto the next name.

Issei discretely flipped him the bird. _'Jackass,' _he thought to himself.

As the teacher continued with roll call, Issei took the time to look around and survey the students; more notably the female ones. He had to admit that he was _really_ lucky to be able to attend such a fine institution with such fine females. Since the school population had a 3:1 female-to-male ratio, pretty much everywhere he looked was filled with girls who either had large, gravity-defying breasts, thick thighs, or wide protruding buttocks.

Simply put: it was a hot-blooded male's paradise. It was just a damn shame they were always clothed.

'_What I wouldn't do to get a peek at some skin right now.'_ Issei thought as he rested his head against his fist with a pout. _'If only there was a way for their clothes to disappear into thin air.' _

He never noticed the bright red flash that emanated from the inside of his closed hand

_FWOOSH!_

The room suddenly fell silent.

Issei blinked.

Every male student in the classroom started leaking blood from their noses.

The teacher's eyes widened to comical proportions before fainting on the spot.

As for the female students?

Each and every one of them sat frozen at their desks, _stark naked_ as the day they were born with looks of indescribable _horror_ on their faces. Large, luscious cheeks were pressed against chairs, connected to thick pale thighs. As for the breasts? Breasts of all sizes were left to jiggle free from the tight confines of their bras. Nipples of various shades were also seen hardening from the cool breeze of the air-conditioned room.

Nobody moved. Nobody _breathed_.

He didn't know just what the hell happened but Issei couldn't find it in himself to care in the slightest. He could now proudly state that this was the best school day of his entire life.

The following collective scream was loud enough to break glass.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?**

Issei whistled a jolly tune to himself as he skipped – literally _skipped_ – merrily down the sidewalk on his way home from school.

Oh, he was _definitely _going to be bringing out his special sock tonight as he planned on letting his perverted imagination run wild and free. Especially after today's sudden wardrobe malfunction. The amount of boobs he was going to be picturing in his mind would be astronomical.

_**[I can't help but feel like I'm going to be seeing something that will leave me blind for the rest of eternity. Not that I wish I wasn't blind with how much I've seen already.] **_Ddraig's deadpanned voice spoke within his head. _**[Besides that, are we really going to ignore how your female classmates were basically stripped naked in the span of a single second?]**_

Issei froze mid-skip and his whistling ceased. "Did you _really_ just ask me if I'm going to ignore the fact that I saw at least _twenty naked girls_ in a single day?"

_**[…Of course. How idiotic of me to even assume you would.]**_

"It's alright, Ddraig. I forgive you." Issei gave his noggin a reassuring pat, and even though the dragon couldn't physically feel it the faux sentiment was there all the same. "Still though," Issei grinned excitedly as he clasped his arms behind his neck. "I actually saw boobs, Ddraig! Live, large and supple boobs that weren't on a computer screen! Smooth flesh and bouncing tits galore! If only a got to fondle a pair then I could die happy!"

Sniffing, Issei wiped some tears that came out of his eyes. "This is the best day of my life!" he shouted into the sky, earning him some confused glances from nearby bystanders.

_**[Perversion and questionable mental state aside; you do realize that it was the stone's doing that caused your classmates clothes to disappear, right?]**_

"Wait, really?" Digging through pocket, Issei pulled out said stone and held up in front of the sun, inspecting it closely with one eye closed. "I mean I could've sworn a saw a flash of red light out of the corner of my eye but I just assumed it was light reflecting from somewhere else. How the hell can a glowing rock make girls' clothes disappear? Wait, why am I even asking? Who gives a shit?! _It made girls' clothes disappear, Ddraig!_" Cupping the stone in his hand, he gave it a large kiss before rubbing it fondly against his cheek. "All I can say is that I fucking love this thing!"

_**[FOCUS BOY!] **_The dragon roared, causing Issei to wince. _**[I told you earlier that the stone houses some kind of latent power that far exceeds my own! We have no idea just what kind of destructive capabilities it could unleash if used incorrectly! If you're not careful you could end up destroying the entire country or worse, the entire world! Don't go meddling with things you have zero understanding of!]**_

"Alright, alright, I get it! Sheesh!" Grumbling, Issei pocketed the stone and rubbed the back of his neck in irritation. "Jeez, spoil my fun why don't you? Has anyone ever told you that you're too uptight? I swear if I ever find a way to get you out of my body the first thing we're going to do is get you laid because you seriously sound like you have a very bad case of the blue balls. Or should I say _Red Balls_? Do dragons even have balls?"

_**[If I wasn't sealed within you I would slowly rip you limb from bloody limb until you begged me for a mercy killing. Which I wouldn't grant as I fed your limbless body to a pack of starving piranhas.]**_

"Aww, I love you too, Ddraig!" Issei cooed as he continued he continued his eventful journey home.

He decided to take a shortcut through a nearby park that was currently devoid of any kids. Seeing as how the sun was currently in its late stages of descending into the horizon, it wasn't at all the surprising that there wouldn't be any kids out this late in the day. Despite his neighborhood being one of the safest in all of town, that didn't stop the occasional shady character from walking the streets late at night.

As Issei made his way across the park's basketball court, he spotted a ball that had been left abandoned near the court's fence. Seeing as how he wasn't in any hurry to make it home, Issei dropped his school bag off to the side and retrieved the ball, making sure to give it a few test dribbles before shooting it in the basketball hoop.

As he wasted his time mindlessly shooting three-pointers, he soon found himself replaying today's erotic event in his head. Thing is though, his mind _wasn't _on the topic of breasts.

If what Ddraig told him was true; that the stone _had_ been the cause of the girls' clothes vanishing, then it was also true that it was indeed a powerful relic. While he could proudly state that he would love nothing more than to see every female in existence – over the age of eighteen, or course – unclothed, that doesn't mean that he was willing to risk mass destruction in order to make it happen. He may have been perverted but he certainly wasn't stupid. Even someone like him knew better than to try and fuck with things he didn't understand.

But that didn't mean he couldn't experiment a little.

Catching the ball, Issei gave the inflated sphere a long, hard stare before an idea suddenly popped into his mind.

The grin that appeared on his lips nearly split his face in half.

Holding the ball in one hand, Issei dug into his pocket and brought out the stone in the other. Holding the two objects close together, Issei closed his eyes and focused.

"Hey, Ddraig," Issei got the dragon's attention. "Remember when you said that I shouldn't try and mess with things I had zero understanding of?"

For some reason, the dragon didn't like where this conversation was going. _**[…Yes?]**_ he asked hesitantly.

"Well I'm going to test out a theory, and it kinda requires me to break that rule."

Oh, no. _**[Issei, whatever it is you're thinking of doing, DON'T.]**_

"Sorry Ddraig, but you see, I just thought of something." The grin on Issei's face became positively sadistic. "See, before all of those girls' clothes vanished into nothingness, I subconsciously wished that I could see them naked and to do so, I had to wish for their clothes to disappear."

The stone in Issei's palm began to glow bright.

"And when I did just that; Viola! No more clothes!"

The glow intensified.

"So I started thinking to myself, 'What if this rock somehow responded to my wish and made it a reality?'"

The stone began to hum with barely restrained power.

If Ddraig hadn't been sealed inside a teenager, as well as a legendary creature of old that brought fear into the hearts of even Gods, he would've run straight for the hills.

"Well, Ddraig…"

Issei opened his eyes.

"I'm about to do the exact same thing. Right here. _Right now._"

_FWOOSH!_

The stone ceased its humming and glowing.

For the second time today, Issei blinked.

The material in his hand changed from rough, bumpy rubber to soft, squishy flesh.

Why, you may ask?

Because the basketball in his hand was instantly replaced with a boob. Or more specifically, a completely spherical boob that was a little bigger than his head and contained a singular nipple that hardened under the cool outside breeze.

"Ddraig?"

_**[…Yes, partner?]**_

"I can now cross 'Obtain stress relief ball in the shape of a boob' off my bucket list."

* * *

Saji Genshirou didn't know what happened.

One second he was walking home from school and then everything around him _froze_ in place.

To be fair, he probably should've listened to his conscious.

After all, it _did_ tell him that he probably shouldn't pick up the glowing green rock that he had found lying underneath some nearby plants.

Maybe next time he'll try to listen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three: If I could keep Time in a bottle.**

"What. The. Fuck."

Those were the three words that pretty much summed up Saji's experience at the moment. He could only stand and stare completely aghast as everything around him froze in place. And when he said everything, he meant _everything_. Cars stopping in the middle if the road mid-drive, people and animals halting in the movements with one or both feet raised in the air, and even the birds had ceased in their flight.

To put it in simpler terms, it was as I God had risen from the dead and had pressed the pause button on the remote control to the universe.

All of this had started the moment he picked up the mysterious rock that glowed a bright luminescent green.

Now Saji could thing of two scenarios for his current predicament; either the rock was laced with some kind of drug and he was experiencing the worst acid trip known to mankind or he was still in class and simply fell asleep, therefore initiating some sort weird fever dream. Thing is though, he was completely healthy this morning so there was no way this could've been a dream either.

_**{You are not hallucinating nor are you in a dream, my other self.} **_The wise consoling voice of his dragon, Vritra, reverberated within his mind. _**{The source of this unnatural phenomenon seems to be emanating from that stone you carry in your hand.}**_

Stunned with disbelief, the blonde looked down at the small glowing rock he still carried in his palm. He had been so engrossed with everything around him that he had completely forgotten about it. "_This _tiny little thing?" he inquired skeptically as he brought it up to his face to inspect it closely. "I mean, yeah, it glows and definitely doesn't look like any sort of rock I've seen before but how can you be so sure it's what's causing all of _this_?" he asked as he gestured to his surroundings.

_**{That 'rock' as you so casually call it is releasing some kind of immense power that I have never felt before. There is also the blatantly obvious fact that everything stayed within motion until the very moment you picked it up.} **_

"Still though," Saji said uncertainly as he twirled the stone in his hand. "I find it very hard to believe that a tiny rock can do something like freeze time."

_**{You seem very calm for someone who just managed to bring all of reality to a grinding halt.}**_

"Oh believe me, I was just about ready to shit my pants the second everything just stopped in place. Hell, I'm still trying to even wrap my head around the mere _idea_ of something so ludicrous happening at all. I just figured that running around and screaming in terror wouldn't do much to help me in this situation."

_**{I'm not sure whether I should feel proud for you keeping a leveled head or concerned for your mentality.} **_

"Well screw you too, you big dumb lizard," Saji grumbled. He proceeded to place the glowing stone in his pocket. "I'll have you know that-"

Saji stopped. He blinked once, twice, three times, and began furiously rubbing his eyes to make sure he wasn't seeing things.

Because as soon as the stone left his hand, the entire world began to move once more. Cars sped down the street, pedestrians and animals kept on walking, and the birds continued to soar through the air. It seemed that God had had enough laughs as he rose from the dead once more and pressed the metaphorical 'Play' button on the remote to the universe.

With a perfectly blank face, Saji slowly reached inside his pocket and touched the stone.

The world froze once again.

He removed his hand from the stone.

It continued in motion.

Saji's jaw almost hit floor. The sheer absurdity of what just happened was too much for his little mind to comprehend.

He rubbed his face into his hands. "Vritra?"

_**{Yes, my other self?}**_

"Remind me to buy a bottle of Tylenol at the store. Scratch that, make it five bottles."

* * *

With his book bag promptly thrown on the opposite end of his room, Saji sat at his desk and stared down at the green stone with a hard contemplative look with his fingers laced together in front of his mouth.

"So let me see if I got this straight," he said after a few minutes of inspecting the shining mineral. "This tiny rock just so happens to have the power to stop Time itself whenever I touch it?"

_**{It would appear so.}**_

"…I'm _really_ not sure how to feel about that. I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to _do_ with that information."

_**{You are in the possession of a stone that can alter all of Time and you have not a single clue as to what to do with it?} **_Even the wise and sagely Dragon King couldn't hide the incredulousness in his voice.

"Well when you put it like _that_ it makes me sound like a complete moron but yeah, I literally have no idea what I'm supposed to do."

_**{My other self, sometimes your ignorance is enough to baffle even me. Do you truly have no idea as to the sheer potential you hold in your hand? The astronomical amount of power that lies within your grasp? Controlling the very essence of Time itself is something that not even the strongest of Gods are capable of doing and you, a mere human, have been able to achieve this in the mere span of a minute. Unintentionally, I might add. Not only are you capable of stopping time but you also may have the potential to even go both forward and backwards in time. You could witness events that have only been seen through textbooks, you could predict and even stop disasters before they even have a chance to happen. Do you not understand what it is you are capable of doing, Saji Genshirou? Because I will tell you: You are singlehandedly able to alter the entire course of both history and future with a single touch of your fingers. Now tell me, my other self: do you still have no idea just what you could do with this power?}**_

To say that Saji was stunned would've been an understatement. The Dragon King certainly had a way with words.

Simply _thinking_ of all the things he was capable of doing with this stone was unbelievable. Vritra had been right, he _could_ end up singlehandedly changing everything he knew about the world by simply touching a rock. He could go back in time and prevent disasters, kill ruthless dictators, stopping wars before they even had a chance to happen, invent things used in today's time that would've been seen as a simple pipe dream back then. He could go forward in time, learn about the future of the earth and the human race, and basically do the same things he could do if he went back in time. The possibilities were seemingly _endless_.

Or he could do something else…

Blood leaked from his nose as a grin slowly spread across his face. Small giggles erupted from his mouth as he rubbed his hands together in a menacing fashion. It was in that moment that he truly looked like your typical everyday movie villain.

Vritra didn't like it at all.

_**{Why do I have the foreboding feeling that I just created a monster of the most unholy proportions?}**_

"Because my dear Vritra…"

Even though the sky was clear, the Dragon King could've sworn he heard the distant clap of lightning.

"_You did."_

Saji's room was soon filled with hysterical laughs that would put an asylum patient to shame.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four: Two Dragons, Two Stones**

Issei didn't know what the hell happened. One second he was walking to school and then suddenly everything around him was frozen in place. As in, literally anything and everything that was capable of movement had just _stopped_. He couldn't even feel the wind. Hell, there wasn't even any _sound_. The only thing that moved or made a sound was him. And for some reason he wasn't as freaked out as he should've been. In fact, he would be lying if he said he wasn't just a little bit _excited _at the prospect of time being stopped.

That didn't mean he was any less wary, however. But like hell that was going to stop him from having some fun.

_**[Of course the prospect of time suddenly stopping out of nowhere isn't even enough to keep your perverted antics at bay.] **_The Dragon Emperor shook his head as he – unfortunately – watched Issei deliver a hard slap to the rear end of a nearby woman. For God's sake she was even with her husband for crying out loud! Did this idiot not have a single speck of shame? _**[Are you not the least bit curious as to how this is even possible?]**_

"Of course I am!" Issei giddily exclaimed as he snuck up behind a mother holding hands with her son and firmly grabbed her large breasts through her thin shirt. The action almost made him cry in joy. He had finally touched real breasts! "Hell, I even wanna find whoever's responsible and kiss them right on the lips! I don't even care if it's a guy! Anyone who can freeze time and let me do this-" he pinched the erect nipples of a high school girl who was obviously _not _wearing a bra, "-is someone I wanna be best friends with! Holy shit, this is even better than seeing all of those girls naked!"

He did an imitation of a victory dance and twirled in place like a ballerina. "I take back what I said yesterday! _This_ is officially the best day of my life!"

_**[If you're quite done with molesting every female you see on the street,] **_The dragon growled in annoyance. _**[I managed to sense a faint energy not far from our location. I believe that it is located at your school. What's even more concerning is that it faintly matches the energy that comes from the stone.]**_

"At my school, you say?" Issei grinned as he rubbed his hands together. "Whoever it is obviously has very good tastes. Every hot blooded male knows that Kuoh Academy is the hotspot for every bodacious babe in town!" He broke out into a sprint so fast that he left behind bits of gravel that remained frozen in mid-air. "What the hell are we waiting for?! Let's go and meet my soon-new best friend!"

_**[And should your so-called 'new best friend' prove to be hostile?]**_

Issei's face instantly morphed into a murderous expression as his eyes faintly flashed the color red.

"Then they're going to fucking _pay_ for intruding on my territory. Nobody is allowed to grab a single pair of those sweet sweater-milkers except for me and those who follow the ways of the pervert!"

Ddraig oh so desperately wished there was a wall he could slam his head into. Why did he ever bother asking?

* * *

Kuoh Academy was considered to be one of – if not – _the_ most prestigious school in all of Japan. Some say that most of Japan's brightest and intellectual minds had graduated from this very school, most of them being female of course due to the school previously being an all-girls academy before it was recently switched to co-ed. If one wanted to make it big in Japan, Kuoh Academy was considered to be the number one school to attend. To the youth of the Land of the Rising sun, it was seen as both a beacon of success and a gateway to the higher society of Japan's Elite. To the older generations it was seen as the pride and joy of a prospering country.

To Issei Hyoudou, however, it was seen as his personal hunting ground; with the prey being the breasts of every single female student on campus and the hunter – or _hunters_ to be more specific – being the wide open palms of his hands.

And someone had come to either share in the same mind-numbing pleasures of debauchery that he indulged himself in everyday or they had the goddamn _nerve_ to intrude on his territory. And God help anyone who even _attempted _to steal a single pair of _his_ bountiful boobs. He would reserve his judgment for now but if they stepped just a single foot out of line…

Well, they would instantly learn why it's seen as a _very_ bad idea to try and steal from a dragon.

"Yeah, they're here alright," Issei said as he stopped just outside the school's gate. "And it feels like they're in the…oh _fuck_ no!" Issei shot off like a fired bullet into the academy's main building. He was in such a hurry that he didn't even bother to stop and grope the dozens of frozen females he past. "Shit! They're in the fucking Student Council office! I swear if they even thinkof touching Kaichou's budding knockers I'm going to rip _both_ their heads off!"

As he climbed their stairs leading to the second floor in a matter of seconds, Issei swiftly made a right and sprinted down the hallway until he skidded to a halt in front of a large set of double doors.

Grabbing both the doorknobs, Issei practically ripped the doors off their hinges. "Alright, motherfucker!" he screamed as he stomped his way in. "Hands where I can see…them…"

It took Issei a total of three seconds to comprehend what he was seeing before his jaw was practically dislocated with how far it dropped.

Standing there on the other end of the ornate table that occupied the Student Council office was a blonde guy his age that he vaguely recalled seeing a few times in the hallways. Said blonde was pressing himself tightly against the slim back of the Student Council Vice-President, Tsubaki Shinra – who was by far one of the hottest girls in the entire school – and was squeezing her large, voluptuous breasts in a very tight grip as if they were a lifeline. While the sight may have been nothing new to someone like Issei, it was the fact that both the girl's shirt and bra were currently _off_ that made the scene much more erotic. He could even faintly see the girl's large and erect nipples poking through the crevices of the blonde's fingers.

If Issei wasn't so shocked to the core at what he was seeing, he was sure he would've flown out of the room in a pulsing jet of nose blood.

He wasn't the only one who was stunned. The blonde was staring at him with comically wide eyes and a gaping mouth; his skin was so pale that it could've been mistaken for paper. He looked as though he had just been caught committing a murder.

Neither of the two said anything as they stared at each other. The situation they were both in was so ludicrous that they didn't even know how to react.

_**{This feeling,} **_Both of the boys jumped at the deep voice that emanated from the blonde's right hand. _**{Is that you, Ddraig?}**_

_**[I thought I had sensed you, Vritra.] **_The rough voice of Ddraig said from within Issei's own right hand. _**[It seems we both found ourselves in the same predicament.]**_

_**{That depends, is your wielder secretly a closest lecher who gets off on molesting women when they're frozen in time?}**_

_**[Multiply mine's perverseness a thousand fold and you're not even close.]**_

_**{That bad, is he?}**_

_**[His constant need to fondle the flesh of a female does get extremely tiresome but I regret to say that I have long since gotten used to it. And as loathe as I am to admit it, he is certainly more entertaining than any of my previous wielders. Perverseness aside that is.]**_

_**{Thankfully mine isn't that perverted, though that obviously doesn't stop him from indulging in his urges as you can see him doing now.}**_

It should be known that Saji was still firmly grasping Tsubaki's breasts despite the conversation that was taking place. Issei didn't seem to be paying attention to any of it as he kept his eyes entirely focused on Saji – or more specifically – the huge pair of flesh orbs that were being tightly handled. The boy's grip on them was so tight that they slipped between the cracks of his fingers.

_**[Excluding our wielders' raunchy behavior; we came here because we sensed an unknown energy signature coming from within the school. Would your wielder happen to be the one responsible for causing all of time to stop?]**_

_**{You are correct, Ddraig. Though the cause was not him, per se, but instead a mysterious stone that he had found during the day before.}**_

_**[Wait a moment, a stone?]**_ Ddraig quickly asked. _**[What did it look like?]**_

_**{No bigger than your average-sized rock with an otherworldly green glow.}**_

_**[…] **_

_**{Ddraig?}**_

_**[Vritra, tell your idiot wielder to stop groping the devil's chest. We are all going to go have a long discussion.] **_

_**{Why, Ddraig? What is going on?}**_

_**[I shall tell you as soon as my perverted wielder stops gawking at the devil's breasts like an insufferable moron and gets us to a secluded location.] **_

Needless to say it took both dragons screaming at the top of their powerful lungs to get both boys moving. Neither of them had still paid any attention to what their dragons had been saying.

* * *

"So you're telling me that you also found some kind of weird glowing rock that lets do all of these crazy things?"

"Yep."

"And your rock supposedly lets you create and/or wish for anything you want?"

"Uh huh."

"And it's because of you and said rock that all of those girls from yesterday were suddenly stripped naked in broad daylight?"

"Pretty much."

"…I don't know whether to punch you upside the head for doing something so embarrassing to a bunch of innocent girls or shake your hand for coming up with something so ingenious."

_**{You were right Ddraig; it seems perverted minds do think alike.}**_

"Hey! Don't lump me in with him! I'm not anywhere as near as perverted as he is!"

"You say that, yet that didn't seem to stop you from freezing time and using the opportunity to grope the shit out of Shinra-sempai's breasts."

"S-Shut up! At least I didn't strip a bunch of girls naked in the middle of a classroom!"

"Unless I'm mistaken, I seem to recall you wanting to shake my hand for that 'ingenious idea.'"

_**[If you had any shred of a brain in that head of yours, host of Vritra, you would do well to remain as far away from my host's hands as possible. They have done things that I wouldn't wish on even my worst enemies.]**_

"Hey, since we're all spilling each other's secrets; did you guys know that Ddraig skipped out on his girlfriend because he supposedly got her pregnant and was too much of a chicken-shit to be a responsible father? What was her name again Ddraig? Tia-something?"

_**{Hold a moment, you mean Tiamat?!}**_

"Yeah, that's it!"

_**{Tiamat?! As in the Chaos Karma Dragon and strongest of all Dragon Kings?! THAT Tiamat?! Great damnation, Ddraig, how did you manage get HER of all dragons pregnant when she would maim nearly every male who so much as looked at her funny?! I didn't even think she was interested in finding a mate let alone actually breeding with one!}**_

_**[W-Well, ah…y-you see-]**_

"Can we PLEASE get back on the fucking topic of magic rocks before I lose my shit to all of this insanity?!"

_**[Ahem, your host is correct, Vritra. We should indeed get back on topic.]**_

_**{This conversation isn't over, Ddraig!}**_

_**[MOVING ON!] **_The dragon roared, ceasing anymore nonsensical chatter that might've sprung up. Thankfully no one said anything further, prompting Ddraig to continue. _**[As I was saying earlier, it appears that both of our hosts have each come into contact with a stone that gives them unique and – ridiculously overpowered, if I might add – abilities; one with the power to control time and the other with the power to alter reality. So far not a single one of us knows where it is these stones originated from or how they found their way to earth, but what we do know is they are, quite possibly, the most powerful objects in the entire world, perhaps even in the entire universe. It's honestly a miracle how none of the other pantheons or factions have come to claim them, especially with the tremendous amount of power they give off. However we can no longer assume that they haven't now been made aware of their existence due to our hosts' usage of the stones. We all must tread very carefully from now on. No doubt that at least the three factions have sent their agents to investigate recent energy surges.]**_

"Whoa, whoa, wait a minute!" Saji exclaimed in fear as he jumped to his feet. "Are you saying that I just painted a giant fucking target on my back just by using a fucking rock?!"

_**{I told you that you should be extremely cautious when using the stone, my other self. Yet it seems you were more concerned with groping the female devil than you were for your own safety.}**_

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, VRITRA! IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU ENTICING ME WITH THE POSSIBILITES OF ALTERING TIME TO MY VERY WHIM I WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN DONE ANYTHING IN THE FIRST PLACE! IF THERE'S ANYONE TO BLAME FOR THIS, ITS'S YOU FOR COCKTEASING ME WITH YOUR LITTLE INSPIRATIONAL SPEECH!"

"I mean, it's not necessarily a badthing," Issei rubbed his cheek sheepishly. "You _did_ get to squeeze Shinra-sempai's bodacious fun-sacks, after all. Do you have any idea how many of our classmates – both male _and_ female – would literally kill to just to get a peek at them? She has one of the biggest racks in the entire school."

"GODDAMNIT, HYOUDOU! YOU'RE NOT HELPING!"

"And you do realize I could've easily stripped her, as well as the rest of the Student Council naked with just a single thought right?"

"HRGH!" Was the only response Issei got as the blonde flew back with a geyser of blood shooting out of his nose.

_**[I swear I'm surrounded by the biggest pair of morons that have ever walked this earth.]**_

_**{You and me both, Ddraig.}**_

"Regardless!" Saji shouted as he wiped his nose clean of any remaining blood. "Just what the hell are we supposed to do against fucking _Gods_?! Even with the stones there's no way in hell we're going to able to fight off a bunch of supernatural beings who've existed since the beginning of time!"

_**{Which is why I propose that we stick together for the time being.} **_Vritra advised. _**{There is strength when fighting alone and even more strength when fighting together. Even a dragon requires aid every now and then, and it would greatly increase your chances of survival if you two were to remain at each other's side.} **_

_**[Vritra's reasoning rings true. Issei, I believe it is time I taught you how to use the Boosted Gear. Even with the stone you will still need all of the power at your disposal if you ever hope to lose that worthless virginity of yours.]**_

"Hey!" Issei barked in indignation.

"…What." Saji asked with a blank face as he stared at Issei as though he had grown a second head.

_**{Excluding the virginity part, the same remains true for you, my other self. It is time I taught you how to fully utilize your Sacred Gears.}**_

"…I don't know whether to feel relieved or insulted so I'm just gonna stay quiet."

_**[Alright, now that we have a plan I believe that it would be wise for us to-]**_

Ddraig never got the chance to finish as a _massive_ energy wave of astronomical proportions suddenly washed over the four and absolutely _smothered _them all in a tsunami of overwhelming pressure.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Issei and Saji shouted as they gripped their heads and gritted their teeth in pain.

_**{Ddraig! Did you-}**_

_**[It was impossible not to, Vritra! In fact, I have no doubt in my mind that just about every supernatural being on the planet felt it as well!]**_

_**{But that power! That signature! It's-}**_

_**[I'm afraid so,] **_Ddraig said grimly. _**[Something has happened with Albion. Something I fear that not even our currently combined strength could ever hope to match.]**_

* * *

Vali Lucifer craved battle as much as a nymphomaniac craved sex. The rush of adrenaline, the pleasure of feeling your fists shredding skin and breaking bone, the utter _bliss_ of watching your opponents die at your feet. If he were the kind of person to have any sort of kink, fighting would be it. The feeling of beating those who arrogantly claimed to be stronger than him was nothing short of _orgasmic_.

Which was why he was tremendously disappointed when Azazel sent him on a fool's errand to take care of a coven of rogue magicians who were hiding out somewhere in the outskirts of the Underworld. Seriously, he was the wielder of one of the two Dragon Emperors and that damned birdman was sending him to kill a couple a wannabe wizards?

It was an insult of the highest order.

Vali didn't even give an inch of effort in ripping the head off of one of the magicians with the force one would use to rip a piece of paper in half. His draconic armor casually shrugged off the spell of another mage before delivering a punch straight through her entire abdomen. The last of the mages surrendered and tried to plead for his pathetic life but was entirely ignored as Vali grabbed the man's head and impaled it through his own wooden staff.

It irked him to no end when someone was reduced to begging for their lives. If you were gonna die anyway than at least try to do so with some dignity and not cowering like an injured rat.

Vali sighed as his armor disappeared, leaving him in his casual getup. Placing his hands in his pockets, he strode through the magician's layer in search of any supposedly dangerous or harmful objects or artifacts that Azazel 'kindly' requested he bring back to him for whatever reason. Probably for more of his useless Sacred Gear research.

Searching throughout the entire area and finding nothing, Vali was about to give up until his enhanced draconic senses picked up the faintest trace of _something_ that he couldn't make heads or tails of. Looking around the place once more, Vali was able to locate a stairway hidden behind a semi-open bookshelf. Cautiously stepping inside, he slowly made his way down the stairs until he was lead into an underground basement of sorts. The entire room was empty except for a single pedestal that protruded up from the ground.

Within that pedestal was what looked like a small rock that gave off an eerily purple glow.

As Vali got closer to the pedestal, his heightened senses began to spike in alarm and the pressure around the room seemed to increase drastically with every step he took. Whatever this thing was, it _pulsated _power in waves like a nuclear reactor.

"What is this thing, Albion?" Vali questioned through gritted teeth as he fought to keep himself standing. Gods, just how much energy did this thing have?!

_**(No idea, Vali.) **_The White Dragon Emperor sounded on edge, which was rare even for him._** (Whatever it is, it's extremely powerful and surely just as dangerous. I wouldn't recommend touching it under any circumstance.) **_

"Unfortunately I'm going to have to ignore your recommendation, Albion. Azazel said to bring back anything I managed to find, and it looks like I just found something _very _interesting." With a shaking hand, Vali reached out for the stone.

_**(Vali, wait-)**_

His hand came into contact with the stone.

Pure, unbridled _power_ surged within his entire body before it _exploded _outwards with the force of an atomic bomb, sending intense, pressurized shockwaves throughout not only the entire Underworld, but also throughout the entire world as well as every supernatural realm that existed.

Pain more agonizing than he had ever felt before burned through Vali's skin and threatened to tear him apart from the inside. However, that pain soon turned into pure _pleasure_ as he felt his strength increasing to seemingly _infinite _proportions.

The grin that etched its way onto Vali's face would've scared even Satan himself.

Suddenly, having to work for Azazel and teaming up with Ophis seemed like a complete and utter waste of time now.

"Now _this_ is power."

Power, indeed. And Vali had more than enough of it now.

"Albion, I think I may finally be ready to kill that accursed Great Red. But first," Still grinning, Vali cracked his knuckles. "What say we pay a little visit to the Olympians?"


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Free you Mind and the rest will follow.**

"N-No w-wait, please!"

_BANG!_

"Fucking hell, her hole was like a mile wide. I pay good money for these whores and that's the best I get? What a waste of cum."

Freed Selzen scowled down at the body of the now dead prostitute as he fastened his belt around his pants. Holstering the smoking gun, he went over and retrieved his priest robes before putting them back on as well. Making sure his sword was sheathed and hidden within the confines of his robes, Freed threw the door open and swiftly exited the cheap motel room, not sparing another glance at the deceased whore with a two-inch bullet hole in her forehead.

"I mean seriously," Freed said to himself in irritation as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. "You would think that at least one of these fucking street skanks was a little tight but _nooo_, I just had to fucking get the one with the Mariana Trench-sized cunt. And to make it things even fucking worse there hasn't been a single shitty-ass Devil for me to slaughter. Can this night get any fucking worse?"

As if Fate had decided to relieve her boredom by screwing with him, the weather turned into a downpour of rain as soon as he stepped outside.

"Fucking seriously?!" he yelled incredulously. Growling, he looked up towards the sky. "Oi, bitch! If you're gonna fuck me over then come down here and at least have the fucking courtesy to suck me off first!"

If the bad weather wasn't enough, Freed began to hear the distinct sound of police sirens in the distance.

"Well fuck you too, you sleazy cuntbag!" he gave the sky the double middle finger before hightailing it out of the area. While he could very easily kill a couple of cops, he wasn't in the mood to get into a pissing match with the local authorities. He was already in a bad enough mood and the last thing he wanted right now was the law enforcement to chase his ass all over town. Therefore the best course of action was to head back to the abandoned church where he and his 'colleagues' were staying. Hopefully Big Tits would be there to help him release the stress he was building up.

* * *

Freed entered the church with the subtlety only someone of his insane mental state could accomplish.

Translation; he kicked the fucking door down.

"Oi, Big Tits! Where the fuck are ya?" he called out as he strutted into the rundown building.

"Damn it, Freed! Can't you open a door like a normal person?!" A husky voice replied in annoyance. Freed felt his lust spike at the sight of the _very_ voluptuous Fallen Angel sitting on one of the leftover pews. She wore a very tight, open-collared trench coat that showed off her large breasts as well as her curvy figure. The coat was connected to a short miniskirt that showed off her thick thighs and long legs. She had deep blue hair that reached all the way down to her feet and wore a gold necklace that dangled in the deep trench of her cleavage.

Currently her arms were crossed under her breasts, making them appear to be even larger than they already were while her eyes were narrowed at the silver haired priest. "You know Raynare's going to kill you when she finds out you broke the door again."

Freed grinned like a horny teenage boy as he shamelessly roamed his eyes up and down her body. "Forget that shit!" he giddily exclaimed as he started undoing his pants. "Quick! Make yourself fucking useful and whip those knockers out! I've got a fucking bad case of the blue balls and a good old fashioned tit fuck is just what I need!"

His pants dropped to the ground, revealing his hardened erection barely hid underneath a pair of boxers. However he didn't get a chance to continue as he suddenly dove to the floor and narrowly dodged a yellow spear made of light that very nearly impaled him on the spot. "Oi, what the fuck?! _I'm_ the one who's supposed to be doing the penetrating!"

"PENETRATE THIS, YOU PERVERTED ABOMINATION!" The woman screamed as she conjured another light spear and threw it at the priest. Freed cursed as he dodged left and right in a serpentine pattern.

"What the fuck is going on here?!" Another feminine voice called out angrily. The two looked over and saw another Fallen Angel with long, black hair and dressed in a dominatrix type of getup with spikes and all. Minus the riding crop of course. "Freed, Kalawarner, what the hell are you two doing?!"

"Ray-chan, quick! Get naked and give me a tit fuck! Lives depend on it!"

He was met with a blank face before once again having to dodge another light spear, this one being magenta in color.

"Fucking shitballs! Is every Angel whore in this fucking place a sissy-ass virgin?!"

"Quit screwing around, Freed! I have another assignment for you!"

"What?!" Freed cried out in disbelief as he got up and pulled up his pants. "Are you fucking shitting me?! I literally just got back like five fucking seconds ago!"

"Well now I'm sending your ass back out! There's a small group of Stray Devils that are hiding out somewhere nearby and I need you to go and kill them all!"

"Can't this shit wail till tomorrow? I don't know if you fucking noticed, Ray-chan, but it's a goddamn monsoon outside! And if you think I'm going out there and getting soaked to the fucking bone then you got another thing coming!"

"Oh, you're going," Raynare narrowed her eyes as she conjured another light spear and held it up in a threatening manner. "Because if you don't then I'm gonna cut off the very thing that makes you a man and feed it to those strays myself."

"Pffft! Like you got the fucking tits-FUCK!" Freed shouted as the light spear sailed past his face and cut his cheek. "ALRIGHT, I'LL FUCKING GO! JESUS FUCK!"

"And don't come back until the job's done!"

"OH I'LL CUM, ALRIGHT! ALL OVER YOUR FUCKING FACE WHEN THOSE TITS OF YOURS ARE WRAPPED AROUND MY DICK!" Freed screamed before he stomped his way out of the church in a fit of rage. Gritting his teeth tightly, he pulled up his collar in an attempt to keep the rain off of his head, which failed miserably as he could already feel his hair getting soaked. _'Stupid fucking bitch,'_he thought to himself as he made his way over to where the Stray Devils were located. _'Making me do all this shit. I swear to fuck I'm going to get that tit job even if my fucking life depends on it.'_

* * *

It turns out that the 'small horde' Raynare informed him about consisted only a four strays, which was both a relief and a disappointment to Freed. A relief because it meant he could finish a lot sooner than he initially expected and a disappointment because he had also been hoping for a bit of a challenge.

Flicking the blood off of his sword, Freed re-sheathed the weapon and left the discarded corpses to fester in the dark. Thankfully the rain had long since stopped in its seemingly endless downpour so he was at least granted the small courtesy of an easy walk home.

"Tch, who the fuck does that bird bitch think she is?" Freed said to no one in particular as he kicked a discarded soda can out of the way. "First I get the absolute worst screw of my life then she sends me out on these pussy errands? If she doesn't at least let me suck on those fat nipples of hers then I'm going to lose my goddamn-huh?"

Freed stopped walking when something caught his attention. A garbage can that was placed near one of the many houses in the neighborhood he was walking through was wide open and letting out a soft dim of light from the inside. At first he thought it might've been a trash fire started by some kids but that quickly changed when got closer. Staring into the can, he saw that the glow was coming off of a small object that was partially buried underneath a trash bag. With a curious yet disgusted face he reached into the can and grabbed the object before pulling it out and inspecting it closely.

His curiosity died right there on the spot when he saw what the object was. Whatever he had been expecting, it certainly wasn't this.

Sitting there in the palm of his hand was a rock. A rock that was glowing as yellow as Kalawarner's light spears.

Freed had only three words to summarize this random scenario.

"What. The fuck."

* * *

"About damn time!" Raynare yelled as soon as she saw the white haired man enter the church. "What the hell took you so long?!"

Freed planted himself down on one of the pews with his feet kicked up before digging through his pocket. "Well since _somebody _wasn't willing to give me a tit fuck, I had to settle for jerking off instead. A man can only go for so long before he starts getting backed up, you know."

"Are you shitting me?" Raynare asked with her eyebrows raised in an unbelieving expression. "It took you _four hours _just to rub one out? Did you fall asleep in between strokes or something?"

"Hey, I don't jump on your ass for pleasuring yourself with a dildo in the shape of Kokabiel's cock so don't question me on my jerking off habits."

Red in the face from embarrassment and rage, Raynare was about to retort in a rather violent manner until she saw the glowing object that Freed had fished out of his pockets. "Hey, what the hell is that?" she asked as he started flicking it into the air like a coin.

"No fucking idea," he replied lazily as he caught it in his hand. "Found in it in some garbage can on the way back. Thought it looked cool so I kept it."

Raynare remained silent as she stared at the eerily glowing object. She didn't know why but for some reason the mere sight of it was making her feel _very_ on edge. The hairs on the back of her neck stood straight up and she swore that the temperature in the church got a few degrees colder. It also didn't help that the she couldn't even sense what it was, meaning it was either something completely harmless or _very_ dangerous.

And Freed Selzen was nonchalantly tossing it up into the air like a pebble he found off the side of the street.

"Hey, let me see that for a second." Raynare said as she walked up with her hand held out.

Freed caught the object and held it away from her as he gave her the stink eye. "I think the fuck not. Finder's keepers. Go get your own."

Raynare returned his heated stare with her own. "I wasn't _asking_. Give me the fucking thing right now."

"Listen, you daft-headed cunt," Freed said through gritted teeth as he slowly stood up and faced the Fallen Angel. "I'm _really_ not in the fucking mood to deal with your shit right now. So unless you're about to get on your knees and give me that tit fuck I've been politely asking for, you better back the fuck off right now before shit goes from zero to a hundred real fucking quick."

"And _I'm _not in the mood to deal with anymore of your rebellious attitude, Selzen." Raynare growled as she continued her advance. "Also you forget who it is you answer to. So be a good boy and give me the fucking-"

She was interrupted as Freed's hand shot out and painfully gripped hers in a tight hold. Her teeth gnashed together in pain as she felt her bones beginning to crack.

"_I said,_" Freed whispered, his voice sounding like death, itself. "_Back the fuck off._"

In his other hand, the stone's glow increased in intensity.

Raynare's eyes flashed before her purple irises suddenly changed to a shade of light blue. Before Freed could process what happened, Raynare retrieved her arm from his vice-like grip and stepped back.

"My apologies, Freed." Raynare said in an empty voice, stunning the man. His shock only increased when she gave him a low and steady bow. "I let my emotions get the better of me. I hope you can find it within yourself to forgive my unsightly attitude."

Freed, for his part, couldn't think of a response to the Fallen Angel's sudden change in behavior, so he simply settled for using the three words he was more accustomed to using for these types of situations.

"What. The. Fuck."

Ignoring his words, Raynare stood ramrod straight with her arms clasped together in front of her. "Does my apology not satisfy you, Freed? Perhaps there's something else I can do to make up for it?" Her posture made her look like a maid eagerly awaiting orders from her master.

Freed couldn't decide what he should be focusing on more; Raynare's unexpected change in attitude or the fact that her arms were pushing her large breasts enticingly close together.

However all traces of common sense were thrown out the proverbial window as her question echoed deep within his mind. "Anything, you say?" he asked as his eyes wandered across her curvaceous body.

Seeing where his eyes were roaming, Raynare leaned forward in a slow manner, causing her breasts to swing and jiggle, though her face still remained blank. "If it means you'll forgive me than I shall do anything you wish."

Freed's hard-on came back with a vengeance. "Well I sure as shit wouldn't say no to a good tit fucking."

"Very well." Raynare responded simply as she reached back and unclasped her tight leather bindings. Free of their restraints her breasts fell out and jiggled in place with her nipples hardening as soon as they came into contact with the cold air.

"W-Wait! You're fucking serious?!" Freed asked in an equally dubious and excited tone.

"Of course," Raynare stated as if it were obvious. Slowly she started walking up to the priest with her hips gyrating and her breasts lightly swaying from side to side. "I did say that I would do anything to earn your forgiveness."

Her seductive movements were all it took for Freed to instantly lose whatever traces of doubt he had in his mind. Stuffing the stone back in his pocket, he swiftly undid his belt and all but threw his pants and underwear off his legs before hastily sitting down and spreading his legs. "Well, what the fuck are you waiting for?! Get to work!"

Nodding her head at the order, Raynare kneeled herself down in front of him and wrapped his rock hard erection in the deep ravine of her cleavage.

Grinning like a maddened cheshire cat, Freed closed his eyes and tilted his head back as he lost himself within the oncoming bliss.

* * *

When Kalawarner heard moans coming from inside the church, she merely assumed that Raynare was once again having her own little private time with her favorite toy.

That assumption was promptly decapitated and burned at the stake as soon as she saw Raynare kneeling in front of Selzen's wide open legs and viciously sucking him off with the force of a dozen vacuum cleaners.

The sight made her want to bury her own spears into her eyes.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Kalawarner screamed in shock, causing both occupants to jump in surprise before setting their sights on her.

"Hey, Big Tits!" Freed happily waved at her while Raynare went right back to devouring his cock.

Kalawarner ignored him in favor of staring at her leader with a look of utter disbelief. "RAYNARE, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

"Sucking me off like a black hole, the fuck does it look like?" Placing his hands on her head, Freed pressed her deeper into his groin and hissed in pleasure. "Oh fuck! That's it! Right there you slut!"

"YOU!" Almost instantly, a light spear was in her hand before she pointed it at Freed. "WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?!"

"Oi, put that fucking thing away before you poke someone's eye out!"

"STOP FUCKING WITH ME AND ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!" Marching up, she placed the very tip of the spear against Freed's face. "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO RAYNARE?!"

"Nothing," Freed scowled as he casually pushed the weapon away with two fingers. "I've literally done nothing to her." A savage grin came to his lips as he held up his other hand and opened it, revealing the glowing stone. "At least, nothing she didn't _want_ to do."

Feeling that she was seconds away from exploding with righteous fury, Kalawarner used her other hand to reach out towards the priest with the intent of strangling him. "LISTEN YOU PIECE OF-"

His freed hand caught hers just as it was about to touch his face.

The stone glowed brighter once again and soon Kalawarner's eyes were the same shade as Raynare's.

"Now Big Tits, I do believe that you're long overdue for a tit fuck. So why don't you whip out those sweater mammoths of yours and help Ray-chan here get the job done."

With her also set into a blank mask, Kalawarner dispelled the light spear and started unbuttoning her coat. "As you wish, Freed."

The white haired maniac soon found his cock to be sandwiched between two large pairs of soft flesh bags. The bliss he felt as time went on was utterly divine as he continuously coated their faces and tits with streams of his cum. Later on, as he stood over Raynare, who was now kneeling on all fours, and eagerly inserted his still-hardened prick into the moist folds of her pussy, one thought crossed his mind.

'_All bitches beware: Freed fucking Selzen is out of his cage and is about to raise some hell.'_


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: After a long period of contemplation, I have ultimately decided to rewrite Chapter's 6 and 7. **

**Why am I rewriting them, you may ask?**

**To put it simply: I didn't like how either of the chapters ended up after I took the time to reread them. I had originally meant for this story to be comedic with a lot of dark moments mixed in between, hence the graphic scenes with Selzen and the like. However, after taking the time to actually read what I wrote, I kinda realized how retarded it was of me to just suddenly kill off two of the main characters without any reasoning behind them other than the fact that I simply **_**could**_** if that makes any sense to you guys. I didn't mean for it to end up like that in the first place but I guess I was just too eager to get the chapters out that I wasn't really paying attention to what exactly I was writing. I'll be sure to take it more slowly from now on so that I don't end up making any more mistakes in the future (even though I probably **_**will.**_**)**

**I sincerely apologize to any of you who are disappointed with these changes and were expecting a new chapter altogether. Once I get Chapter 7 rewritten I'll try to get a new one out as soon as I can. Though like I said, I'm not gonna try to rush it.**

**Most of this chapter is pretty much the same so you may want to skip ahead towards the end in order to read the changes. Hopefully this one will be better than the last.**

* * *

**Chapter 6: Shenanigans and the Definition of Insanity (Rewrite) **

"This…is…bullshit!" Issei said between breathes as he struggled to stay standing. His legs were beyond sore and his entire body was drenched in sweat. It didn't help that he was still in his school uniform.

"You're telling me," Saji was just as out of breath as his classmate. The young blonde was currently situated near the trunk of a destroyed tree. He sat with his legs crossed with his back leaning against the torn bark. He paid no attention to the small shards of wood prickling against his skin as he wiped his head with his school blazer. "Remind me again how destroying trees is considered training, Vritra?"

_**{Power means very little if one has no control over it, my other self.}**_ The Dragon King informed his host. His voice came through a small black gauntlet resembling a beetle on Saji's hand. _**{Though you have learned the basics of using the Absorption Line, you still must learn how to properly control and harness its full power. Especially when it comes to using my flames. A loose spark will only result in an out of control inferno. Case in point being those unfortunate trees over there.} **_Although the Dragon King was unable to physically do so, his voice gestured over to the numerous trees that had been reduced to nothing but burned and blackened charcoal.

Saji groaned. "I can pause all of time at will but somehow can't manage to control a single line of fire. That has to be some kind of bad joke."

"Hey! At least you get something cool!" Issei shouted in indignation. He gestured to the red gauntlet on his arm. "All mine does is say 'Boost' every few seconds!"

_**[Need I remind you, partner, that your power is doubled every time said 'Boost' occurs?]**_ The green gem on the gauntlet lit up as Ddraig spoke. _**[Or the fact that you are able to transfer that power into anyone or anything of your choosing? With enough time and dedication, you could one day gain enough power to take down even the Gods, themselves. And considering that Vritra's host stop time whenever he wants, you two could literally spend all of eternity getting stronger if you chose to do so.]**_

"I mean we could. Or…" A grin formed its way onto Issei's face as his expression became positively perverted. "We could spend the rest of eternity groping all of the breasts we could ever want! You hear that, Saji?! You could grab Shinra-sempai's bodacious rack as much as you want and never get in trouble for it!"

"Like hell I'm doing that, Hyoudou!" Though try as he might, the blonde couldn't stop the nosebleed that occurred as the _very_ tempting that entered his mind.

_**[I honestly don't know why I even bother anymore.] **_Ddraig let out a long sigh. _**[It seems no matter what I say, the only thing that goes through this cretin's mind are the mammaries of a female.]**_

_**{At the very least he has the decency to keep his urges in check. Who knows what might happen if he allowed himself to give into his lustful desires?}**_

"Hey! Don't go and make sound like some sort of rapist!"

_**[To be fair, partner, you did forcibly strip the clothes off of your classmates.]**_

"Yeah well…Saji's the one who groped Shinra-sempai without her consent! So technically that would make him a molester!"

"OI, DON'T GO ACCUSING ME OF BEING A MOLESTER WHEN YOUR'RE THE ONE WHO GOES PERVING AROUND ON GIRLS IN THE LOCKER ROOMS EVERY FUCKING DAY AT SCHOOL! AT LEAST I KEEP MY EYES AWAY FROM WHERE THEY AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE WHEN YOU'RE THE ONE WHO OPPENLY GAWKS AT EVERY PAIR OF TITS THAT COMES WALKING IN YOUR DIRECTION!"

"YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I DO! WANNA KNOW WHY?! IT'S CALLED BEING A FUCKING MAN! YOU SHOULD TRY IT SOMETIME, YOU PRISSY VIRGIN!"

"HEY, I MIGHT BE A VIRGIN BUT YOU WANNA KNOW SOMETHING, HYOUDOU?! _I'M _THE ONE WHO'S ACTUALLY GRABBED A PAIR OF REAL, GENUINE TITS BEFORE YOU DID SO WHO'S THE REAL LOSER?!"

…

There was a beat of silence.

"What?! Got nothing else to say, Hyoudou-"

_**[BOOST!]**_

_**[EXPLOSION!]**_

Saji was nearly reduced to his knees by the overwhelming amount of power that shot out of Issei like a cannon. His entire body was surrounded by a crimson aura and the red gauntlet on his arm was alight with a bright green hue from the green jewels embedded into its armor. Issei's hair covered his eyes, effectively hiding his expression but Saji was clearly able to see his teeth gritting tightly together while his fists tightened at his sides. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Issei was clearly _pissed_.

Time wasn't frozen at the moment but Saji could've sworn that everything around him stopped all the same.

"You know something, Saji?"

Issei's voice was but a whisper on his lips but the blonde was able to hear it as if he were standing right next to him.

"The first time I laid eyes on you grabbing Shinra-sempai's breasts like they were the world's softest marshmallows, I thought that I had finally found myself a fellow brother in arms. Someone who could finally appreciate the ways of the pervert just as I have."

He took a single step forward. The pressure in the atmosphere nearly doubled.

"I thought to myself, 'Finally! Here's someone who knows just how much joy breasts have brought to the world!' Until then I thought I had always been alone in that endeavor. I thought I would be forced to walk this earth for the rest of my life knowing that there would never be a single soul who loved breasts as much as I do."

Another step forward. Then another and another. For every one he took it felt as though the gravity was doubling in its intensity. It was so suffocating that Saji barely had enough strength to move his head. He could only sit and stare with wide-eyed fear as Issei made his way closer to his quivering form.

Finally after what felt like an eternity, Issei stopped directly in front of Saji and stared down at him with glaring green eyes. They were just as green as the jewels on his gauntlet.

Slowly, almost agonizingly so, Issei knelt down and brought his face right up to Saji's. He was so close that they're noses were almost touching. When he spoke, it sounded as if he were death itself.

"_You wanna know what I think now, Saji?"_

It was a good thing Saji had yet to eat anything or else he may have shat his pants right then and there.

However he didn't get the chance to respond when the overwhelming pressure suddenly disappeared as fast as it came and before he knew it, Saji was engulfed in a tight hug from Issei.

"I think I may have just found the best friend I could've ever hoped for."

There were no words or actions Saji could use to describe the sheer ludicrousness of what had just happened. So without verbally doing do, he simply responded by wrapping one arm around Issei's shoulder and gave him a half-hug with a perfectly blank expression.

He _really_ shouldn't have gotten out of bed today.

* * *

It was mid-afternoon by the time their training session had ended and seeing as how it was a Sunday, the boys found themselves without anything to do. Since they were much too tired to do anything physical, they decided that they would waste the remainder of their day off by lazing about.

Currently the two were situated on the floor inside of Issei's bedroom eating snacks and watching television on Issei's small TV. Issei had cordially invited Saji over to his house to hangout, something that the young man had readily accepted since his legs were still too sore to walk home on. Luckily had managed to finish all of his weekend homework the day before so he had the remainder of the day to do whatever he wanted.

"_Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?"_

_Click._

"_Pokemon! Gotta catch 'em all!"_

_Click._

"_It's time to D-D-D-D-Duel!"_

"Seriously? Isn't there anything else on besides these crappy kid shows?" Saji huffed in annoyance has he continued flipping through channels.

"That's why I stick to magazines or the internet," Issei said from his bed as he absentmindedly turned the pages to one of said magazines he was currently reading.

"Yeah well if I wasn't so sure I would see pages stuck together by semen or a fuck ton of internet porn in your search history I might be inclined to join you."

Issei simply shrugged his shoulders. "Suit yourself. Don't blame me if you can't find anything interesting to watch."

Saji grumbled but still made it his mission to find literally _anything_ of interest on the television. The two remained silent for the time being with the only sounds of the room being the clicking of the TV remote, the crunching of chips, and the light flips of magazine pages. As he continued to mindlessly search through the channels, a sudden though made its way into Saji's mind, causing him to stop on some random channel.

"Hey Ddraig," Saji looked over towards Issei, more specifically the hand in which the gauntlet was located. Issei looked back at Saji with an eyebrow raised in confusion but got off the bed and held out his hand in the middle of the two. The dragon said nothing but Saji assumed that he was already listening. "A few days ago you said something happened with someone named 'Albion.' Mind telling us who that is?"

Issei blinked at Saji's unexpected question. He had honestly forgotten about the mysterious name that Ddraig had mentioned earlier. Hearing it now he would be lying to himself if he said he wasn't also a little curious.

The middle of Issei's hand glowed a bright green as the dragon spoke. _**[Albion, also known as the White Dragon Emperor, is someone whom you would call my opposite as well as my rival whom I have fought against for over a millennia. It was him, or more specifically, his host where that tremendous power surge originated from.]**_

Issei and Saji looked at one another surprised. That certainly wasn't what they had been expecting. "Wait a minute, _White_ Dragon Emperor?" Saji asked incredulously. "You mean there's more than one Dragon Emperor sealed in other people like Issei?"

_**[Yes and no. There is more than one Emperor but besides myself, he is the only other one. And also like myself, he too was turned into a Sacred Gear and sealed inside a human by the God of the Bible long before He perished.] **_

"Hopefully they aren't anything like Issei." Saji snickered. Ignoring the outraged 'Hey!' from the young man, he continued. "You said you guys were rivals, right? Why were you guys even fighting in the first place?"

_**[I'm afraid that is a question that even I cannot answer. I doubt even Albion could either. We have fought each other for so long that neither of us can remember how it came to be in the first place.]**_

"Seriously? You guys have kicked the crap out of each other so much that you can't even remember why?" Saji couldn't blame Issei for the dumbfounded look he was giving his own hand. The mere concept sounded so insane that Saji could barely believe it himself. "Damn, that must've been one hell of a fight."

_**{Calling it a mere 'fight' would be like calling both of your World Wars a slap on the wrist.} **_Saji's own hand glowed as Vritra made himself known. _**{Do not take the confrontation between the Dragon Emperors lightly, Issei Hyoudou. Their fights were powerful enough to make even the Dragon Kings weary of them. In fact, they were so powerful that it took the combined might of the Three Factions and God of the Bible, himself, to put an end to it. Were it not for them I have little doubt that they would have torn the world asunder from their endless blows.}**_

_**[You flatter me, Vritra.] **_Ddraig's tone was dry yet both Issei and Saji could detect the underlying pride in his voice.

"Okay, okay, I get that you guys used to beat the shit out of each other for a living but what I don't get is what that has to do with me or Saji." Issei threw his other hand in the air in exasperation. "Why is it that you're making us train so hard? I understand that it's for our own protection but there's another reason isn't there?"

_**[There is. It is because the wielders of both Albion and myself have always been destined to fight each other to the death ever since we were made into Sacred Gears.]**_

…

…

"…What?"

As if this day couldn't get any weirder.

* * *

Olympus was burning.

The mountain which at one time had been a symbol to the Greek Gods and all of their glory looked as if it had been struck by hundreds of Zeus' own thunderbolts. Craters littered its once flawless surface while every single plant, tree, and shrub that had grown there were burnt to ash. The once pearly white clouds that surrounded the great mountain were now the color of dark grey as rain and thunder hammered what was left of the tall protruding piece of earth in an endless dreary storm. However it was the Golden Palace sitting at the very top of the mountain where most of the damage was. Its once shiny and golden halls were drenched with the blood and littered with the torn corpses of hundreds of mythical Greek creatures all ranging from Centaurs to Minotaurs to Gorgons. There was no indication that a battle of any kind had taken place; only that of a complete slaughterhouse.

In the main Throne Room where eleven of the twelve main Olympians resided, only one could be found lying on the ground writhing in unimaginable agony. His toga, which had once been woven by the finest silks in all of Olympus were now burnt tatters. His once large muscles and flawlessly tan skin had been reduced to bone-thin appendages and sickly pale flesh. His eyes were sunken into his sockets and what little amount of hair he had on his body now looked like they were being held on by glue. His teeth clattered together as he attempted to move himself only to result in another wave on pain that made him hiss and screw his eyes shut. Try as he might he couldn't ignore the way his bones painfully scrapped against each other nor could he ignore how the cold air felt like knives against his skin. He was in so much pain that it hurt just to move. Even worse was the fact that he was so incredibly _weak_. Weakness was something he would never tolerate in Olympus yet here he was crawling on the ground like some kind of worm. Just thinking about it brought him more pain than any of his physical wounds.

Loud, armored footsteps clanked behind him, causing him to cease in his futile movements. Growling, the man propped himself on his arms before quickly spinning himself around and landing on his back. The action made him feel like he had been electrocuted which he found to be quite ironic. Leaning on the back on his arms, the man glared up at the tall figure dressed head-to-toe in white draconic armor with as much hatred as his sunken eyes could muster.

"_You…_" The man said with barely restrained fury as he glared into the figure's faceplate. "Do you have any idea what you've _done_?"

"I do." The armored figure said as he reached up and took off his helmet, revealing the smirking face of Vali Lucifer as he stared down at the pathetic looking man. "What I've _done_ is shown the world that the Greek Gods are not as all powerful as they so arrogantly claim."

His mocking tone only seamed to anger the man further as sparks began dancing along the ends of his fingertips. "No. What you've done is made the biggest mistake of your entire existence, _boy_." The man attempted to lift one of his shaking hands only to have it viscously stomped into the ground, resulting in it becoming bloody mess of bone and tendons. The man didn't even get the chance to scream as his face was kicked by Vali's armored boot.

"Clinging to power even when you have none left to use." Vali sneered down at the man's broken form. "Truly your arrogance knows no bounds, Zeus. Aside from Hades I've already killed off the rest of your siblings as well as most of your children. What hope could you ever have against me? Especially as the way you are now?"

The former King of the Greek Pantheon spit out some blood as well as a few teeth before glaring back at Vali. "Do you have any idea what will happen when word of what has happened here gets out? The other Pantheons will not hesitate to go to war now that the balance of power has been swiftly changed. It will be another Great War all over again and this time it will consume both the Supernatural and the Earth whole! Do you understand, boy?! It will not stop until every living being is sent to Oblivion!"

"_I know._" Zeus could only widen his eyes at the uncaring tone in the half-human's voice. He couldn't move away fast enough as Vali slowly made his way over towards the fallen God before swiftly grabbing his head in both his hands. "And what better way to prove myself as the strongest being in existence when every supernatural entity will be gunning for the top?"

With little to no effort, Vali _pulled_.

The horrified expression on the God's face would be permanently frozen as his severed head hit the floor.

* * *

"Goddamn, I fucking love this rock."

Freed couldn't stop the childish giggle that escaped his lips as he stuffed the glowing yellow stone in his pocket and giving it a soft pat. Looking over his shoulder, his giggling evolved into full blown insane laughter as his two Fallen Angel sluts ravaged the young and still developing body of the third female Fallen Angel, Mittelt. Currently the two mature beauties were on their knees, covered head-to-toe in semen, and were each thrusting ten-inch vibrating strap-ons into the tight holes of the younger Fallen Angel with Kalawarner in the front and Raynare in the back. The large breasts bounced erotically as they roughly thrusted their fake phalluses down Mittelt's throat and pussy at the same time in a spit roast style position. Raynare was pulling on the young blonde's pigtails from behind as her thrusts increased while Kalawarner all but jammed the girl's head further and further into her pelvis. Both women were sweating, panting, and moaning heavily while saliva and juice leaked from Mittelt's mouth and nether regions. The young girl in question didn't even seem to be fully conscious of what was happening to her as her eyes, which were the same shade of light blue as Raynare and Kalawarner's, were glazed over and her body hung limply between the two women. It seemed that they had effectively fucked her into a near unconscious state. It was like a scene straight out of a hardcore snuff film.

Knowing that they would be busy for a good _long_ while, Freed decided to let them have their fun while as he kicked the church's doors open and stepped outside with a wide grin. It was a clear sunset out this evening and what better to do than to take a little stroll on the town?

"Making my way downtown, walking fast. Faces pass and I'm home bound. Staring blankly ahead, just making my way. Making my way through the crowd~."

Freed sang merrily to himself as he strode down the sidewalk of a random neighborhood, not at all knowing or caring where he was going. With one hand in his coat pocket, he casually flicked the yellow stone in the air and catching it with the other.

The late evening sky was a darkened yellow as the sun continued to set in the horizon. The cool wind blew gently against his face and cause his shoulder-length white hair to sway gently in the breeze. The entire neighborhood was silent save for the occasional car that past him by along with a small group of birds singing in the distance. If Freed had been anything resembling a sane man, he would have considered the sight a thing of true beauty. The kind of beauty that would inspire any artist to just sit and capture the moment with their paintbrush. Though Freed was anything but a sane man, it didn't the small satisfied smirk that formed on his lips and he breathed in the fresh air. For once there was no malice or insanity in his smile, only simple contentment. He honestly couldn't remember the last time he felt at peace when he wasn't slaughtering devils or heretics by the dozens or indulging himself in mindless debauchery. It was times like this that almost made him wish he was a different man with an actual purpose in his life rather than just a rogue priest on the run from his own faction. That didn't mean he regretted it though. In fact he couldn't think of anything more than running his sword through all of those 'holier-than-thou' pricks at the Vatican. Well, other than an orgy of big-titted naked women of course.

The thought of big-titted naked women caused Freed to let out a perverted giggle as his mind wandered back to his two – now _three_ – fallen angel sluts. Even though he had already blown his fair share of loads all over their supple bodies, he could still feel himself growing erect once again at the thought of the fun he was planning to have with them as soon as he got back. More specifically at the thought of their huge tits bouncing free as he relentlessly fucked them over and over again.

A bit of drool left his lips as his lustful thoughts continued to wander. He was so caught up in his perverted fantasies that he didn't register the pair of voices that got louder as he walked further down the sidewalk.

"-and she was like, 'Are you sure you've been with a guy before? You still look like a virgin to me!' I mean what the fuck? Who the hell does that bitch think she is?!"

"Please calm down, Murayama. I'm sure she was just joking around."

"Oh, she won't be joking once I've planted my foot up her flat, skinny ass!"

The voices, both now identifiable as female, knocked Freed out of his thoughts as he looked ahead and saw two young women walking in his direction. One had brunette hair tied into two pigtails while the other had short pink hair that reached her shoulders. Both girls were dressed in some kind of uniform and Freed felt his lust spike when he saw how well their matching clothes hugged their curvy figures, especially the brunette who had a noticeably bigger rack than her pink-haired counterpart. Their skirts were also rather short, giving the rogue priest a great view of their thick thighs which only added to his growing arousal. They were certainly a pair of fine beauties and didn't look all that much younger than himself.

It took Freed great care to reign in his lust as an idea began forming in his head. Placing the stone back in his pocket, he straitened his posture and crossed his arms behind his back before calmly making his way towards the two with a calm smile. The two girls were so engrossed in their conversation that they didn't notice him until he stopped right in front of them, causing them to almost bum into him.

"Hello ladies!" He greeted them with faux cheerfulness. "Perfect evening for a stroll don't you think?"

"Who the hell are you?" The brunette asked with narrowed eyes as she examined his strange getup.

"Oh, just a random passerby is all." Leaning in, his smile became much more feral. "And may I say that you two look absolutely _delectable _this evening?"

Warning bells immediately went off in both girls' heads as they began to quickly step back. The brunette placed herself in front of her quivering friend as she glared threateningly at the priest. "Back off, asshole or I'll-"

Faster than either of the two could reach, Freed caught up to them and firmly clasped a hand on their shoulders.

The stone in his pocket glowed and pulsated. Both of their eyes instantly became a shade of light blue.

Freed's grin was without mercy. "How'd you two like to come back to my place for some fun?"

* * *

"_I'm going to down to South Park-"_

_Click._

"_Tonight on Hell's Kitchen-"_

_Click._

"_Go, go Power Rangers!"_

_THWACK!_

"Hey! Don't take it out on my TV!"

"What? I'm fucking bored and there's _still_ nothing to watch!"

"Then play another game or something! Just don't wreck my fucking TV! That damn thing cost three years' worth of mowing lawns!"

"Since when do you mow lawns?"

"Since I've had nothing better to do over the last couple summers!"

_**[You mean besides mindless masturbation?]**_

"Shut up, Ddraig!"

Saji, no longer surprised with Issei's perverted tendencies, simply mumbled something unintelligible and leaned back against Issei's bed with his arms crossed.

After another life-draining day at school the two had decided that to once again hangout at Issei's place. Deciding that he could just get what little homework he had done later on, Saji accompanied Issei back to his house where they proceeded to waste the rest of the day away either playing games or in Saji's case, trying to find something to watch on TV to no avail. Issei's parents had both returned home from work a little over an hour ago and hadn't bothered the boys much aside from Issei's father coming in and cheerfully introducing himself to Saji. The blonde had been surprised at how similar Issei and his dad were in appearance. The two were practically spitting images of each other aside from his dad's lighter hair color and the fact that he wore glasses. Other than that the man had seemed like a genuinely nice guy. Saji had yet to see or meet Issei's mom, though he guessed she was currently downstairs preparing dinner or something along the lines.

_**{It never ceases to amaze me how completely idiotic our hosts are.} **_Vritra's voice caught the two's attention. Sensing their eyes on him within Saji's hand, the dragon continued. _**{You both have the power to alter all of time and Reality, as well as the power of a Dragon King and Emperor at the palms of your hands, yet your more pressing dilemma is not finding anything to watch on television?}**_

"Hey, _I'm _perfectly fine ight where I am, thank you very much." Issei replied indignantly as he laid on his bed with a magazine in hand. Saji didn't even have to look to know just what kind of magazine it was. "If anyone's complaining its Sally Sourpants over there."

"I'm going to politely tell you to go fuck yourself, Hyoudou." Saji said with a deadpan stare.

"Your statement has been acknowledged yet will go on ignored, Genshirou." Issei replied without looking up from his magazine.

The blonde pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation. "Vritra does have a point though. What the hell's the point of having all of this power if we aren't even going to do anything with it?"

"Have you not been paying attention to what we've been doing, Saji?" Issei asked as he looked at the blonde with a raised eyebrow. "We _have_ been using our powers. Besides stripping girls naked and groping their boobs, we've been working our asses off training."

"But _why_ though?" Saji casually ignored his friend's perverted statement. "Because some asshole who also happens to have a dragon _might_ come after us? I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that things like Angels and Devils exist!"

"…You have a literal dragon sealed inside you but a bunch of winged people with halos and pitchforks is where you draw the line?"

"Shut up, Hyoudou."

_**{It really shouldn't be all that surprising, my other self. After all, you've been in the presence of devils ever since you began attending that school of yours.}**_

"Say what now?" Saji exclaimed as he looked down at his hand in confusion.

_**{That girl whose chest you were fondling. Tsubaki Shinra was it? She, along with the rest of the Student Council are all devils.}**_

…

…

…

_**[There's also that red-haired girl who secludes herself in the old school building.] **_Ddraig continued in place of Vritra. _**[She and her so-called 'Occult Research Club' are also devils. I was also able to sense the presence of another devil hidden away somewhere within the school.]**_

…

…

…

"You know what? Somehow I'm not as surprised as I should be anymore. I mean we've already got dragons and magic rocks. For some reason finding out our classmates are secretly devils doesn't really seem as crazy."

"Just do what I do, Saji: don't question anything and you'll be just fine."

"That doesn't really inspire confidence in me, Hyoudou."

"It's not supposed to."

_KNOCK! KNOCK!_

"Hello, boys!" An enthusiastic female voice greeted as the door opened. "I just thought I'd come up and bring you both a couple ice-cold drinks and some snacks! You look like you haven't eaten all day!"

"Just set it down on the table, mom." Issei responded as he nonchalantly flipped through his magazine.

"Oh for God's sake, Issei Hyoudou!" His mother exclaimed in annoyance when she caught what her son was looking at. "Do you _have_ to read that when your friend isn't even a foot away from you?!"

"Did you seriously just ask me if I have to read porn?"

His mother shook her head in disgust as she walked over and placed the tray of treats and drinks on the nearby table. "Honestly, Issei, don't you have _any_ shame whatsoever? You better not be bringing any of that filth to school!"

"I don't see why I would since I can just see the thing in real life."

"Issei!"

"What? Have you _seen_ the female uniforms at our school? They're so tight and short they may as well be painted on."

Issei's mother glared down at her son before finally taking notice of the other occupant of the room. "Oh! You must be Saji Genshirou! Sorry I didn't introduce myself earlier!" She bent down and offered her hand to the blonde with a smile. "I'm Kasumi Hyoudou, Issei's mother! A pleasure to meet you, Saji-kun!"

Saji, however, wasn't paying attention at all to the outstretched hand but instead stared at the middle-aged beauty that had graced the room with her presence. Contrary to what Saji had initially believed, Issei Hyoudou's mother was a total bombshell of a woman. Long, deep brown hair the same shade of her son's framed her face and reached all the way to the small of her back while tied into a single ponytail. She stood at just about the same height as her son and had quite the voluptuous body to boot. The pair of jeans she was wearing were tight enough to show off the curves of her small waist and wide, child-bearing hips that lead to a pair of thick thighs. Her large breasts were also barely contained in a tight, buttoned down short-sleeved shirt and Saji didn't miss the way they jiggled enticingly as she bent down and offered her hand.

Feeling a rush of blood just about ready to shoot out of his nose, Saji quickly snapped himself out of his staring and took the woman's hand in his own and immediately noticed how soft it was. "N-Nice to meet you too, Hyoudou-san." Saji stuttered as he looked in a pair of warm brown eyes that were also the same shade as her sons. Even the few wrinkles that lined her aging face didn't at all deter the woman's beauty.

"Kasumi is fine, Saji-kun. No need to be all formal. We're all adults here." She glanced back at her son who was still reading his magazine. "Well, _most_ of us." She gave Saji a wink before standing back up and making her way out of the room. Try as he might, Saji couldn't keep his eyes off of her large, supple backside as it swayed from side to side. The fact that her tight jeans were practically glued to the curves of her generous ass did nothing to keep him from staring. As if sensing his eyes on her, the Hyoudou matriarch turned and gave Saji a pointed yet playful look. "Please try not to let my idiot son corrupt your mind, Saji-kun. One hopeless pervert is more than enough in this house." She sent one last saucy wink before shutting the door behind her.

This time Saji did nothing to stop the blood from trailing out of his nose.

There was no denying it: Issei's mom was a total MILF. No wonder Issei was as big of a pervert as he was. Having to live with a woman that hot was bound to turn any sane man into a lust-crazed animal. Saji couldn't deny that the sight of the busty older woman had definitely made him harder than stone.

Speaking of stone…

Saji didn't notice his hand inching its way into his pocket before another hand suddenly shot out and grabbed his arm in a tight and rather painful squeeze. Startled by the sudden contact, Saji looked over and almost shit his pants at the murderous glare Issei was giving him. It was so intense that Saji could physically _feel_ the pressure in the room doubling.

"If you even _attempt _to do what I know you're thinking," Issei's warned in a low whisper, though it may as well have been as loud as a gunshot with how close it was. "I'll turn you into a fleshlight and throw you in the boys' locker room."

The color completely drained from Saji's before he vigorously nodded his head.

Issei kept his hold on Saji's arm for a moment more before slowly releasing it. As soon as he went back to his magazine the pressure in the room disappeared as soon as it came.

Suddenly channel surfing through the TV didn't sound quite as bad anymore.

* * *

Unbeknownst to the two boys, the supernatural world was in an uproar.

Not only had the immense surge of power that recently swept over the entire planet put every pantheon and faction that existed on edge, it was news of the total annihilation of the entire Greek Pantheon followed shortly after that struck fear and shock to every God, creature, and supernatural-affiliated human. And why wouldn't it? The Greek Gods had been seen as one of, if not, _the_ most powerful pantheon in the whole supernatural word with the Hindu and Egyptian pantheons following close behind. To hear that some of the earth's strongest gods in existence had been wiped out in a single day was completely unheard of, not to mention that it would've been next to impossible for anyone other than the two Dragon Gods to destroy over a dozen Gods that have existed since the creation of the earth. Yet something or someone out there had been powerful enough to do just that. The sudden attack had been so unexpected that it effectively brought the whole supernatural world to a standstill. Despite the massive power vacuum that had been created in wake of the Greek pantheon's destruction, not a single faction were willing to take action at the moment lest they too earn the wrath of whatever was out there. Even some of the more prideful and arrogant Gods weren't willing to make any grabs for power or territory at the moment.

However, one thing that everyone knew for sure was that the tense stalemate wouldn't last for long. One way or another, wars would be started and the blood of thousands, possibly millions would be spilt in the eventual chaos that was sure to spread throughout the supernatural like a plague. The only question was who would be the first to spread the infection?

Deep within the Fallen Angel territory in the Underworld, a certain Governor slammed his head on the table.

"Vali, you little shit."

Azazel withheld a groan as he attempted to settle the growing migraine that was brewing in his head.

He knew he should've seen this coming from over a hundred miles away. Despite his best attempts at raising the silver haired half-devil to be a somewhat decent member of society, deep down he knew that he would never be able to quell the boy's ever-growing the lust for power and that damned unbreakable will of his to be the strongest being in the existence. He supposed that having an abusive megalomaniac as well as a descendent of the original Lucifer for a grandfather would do that to a kid's psyche. Still, he had sincerely hoped that the boy would at the very least have the decency to hold back his hard-on for strength enough to not do anything stupid.

Unfortunately he had been very, _very _wrong. Now the supernatural world was at risk of another Great War because that damned brat just had to go off the deep end. Damnit, why the hell couldn't have he had a lust for women like every other male on the planet? Who in their right mind would value strength over a nice pair of tits?!

"Azazel-Sama."

Speaking of a nice pair of tits…

Lifting his head, Azazel focused his tired eyes on a woman dressed in a firm-fitting business suit that did nothing to hide her lustful curves and the impressive swells of her large breasts. She had long purple hair that flowed down to the small of her back like a violet waterfall. Her bright red eyes shined like rubies in the darkened room as she stared at the Fallen Governor with a narrowed gaze.

"What is it, Penemue? Can't you see I'm having the monster of all headaches right now?" The scientist propped his head on his elbows and picked at his ear with his pinky before flinging the discarded wax away.

The Chief Secretary of the Fallen Angels merely regarded her boss with a look of thinly veiled annoyance before proceeding. "Surely you know that you are not the only one in a state of distress right now? Especially after with what has happened with the Greek Gods?" Her sultry and alluring voice took on a tone of absolute seriousness looked towards the faction leader, who simply raised a single eyebrow at her.

"Really? Must've been stuck in the lab too long to notice. I could've sworn that today was a Monday. You know how much everyone hates Mondays."

"This is serious, Azazel." Her sharp snap and lack of formality clearly meant she was fed-up with her boss' nonchalant attitude. Walking forward, she slammed a folder directly in front of the man. Azazel was so intent on trying to _not_ pay attention to her that he didn't even bother to notice how the slight movement caused the woman's large bust to jiggle beneath her tight suit jacket. "Not only has that brat you _insisted _on taking care of gone and possibly started another Great War, but it's been over a week since Raynare made any progress updates on her mission. We haven't even heard anything from Kalawarner, Dohnaseek, or Mittelt for that matter. Don't you think that's even a _little_ disconcerting? Aren't you worried that little half-breed will come for _us_ next?"

Azazel didn't say anything as her merely looked down at the folder with an empty gaze and his head propped on his fist. It didn't even look like was aware of the Chief Secretary's presence anymore. In fact, he looked like he was doing his very best to ignore literally everything around him.

Fed up at the man's lack of response, the female Fallen grit her teeth and stalked around the table before delivering a sharp slap to his head. "Azazel! Are you even listening to me?!" she barked furiously.

She was met with a sharp burst of overwhelming power that made her take a step back in shock. Slowly, Azazel turned his head in hear direction and stared at the woman with something she hadn't seen in centuries. It made her realize just who she was in the room with and why, despite his ragged appearance and lazy/perverse attitude, he was named leader of the entire Fallen Angel faction.

"I heard you _loud and clear_, Penemue." His drawled, though there was a menacing undertone to his voice. "And just what the hell, exactly, do you want me to do about it? You and pretty much every single supernatural being in every realm felt the power that Vali released. How he was able to suddenly achieve that much in a single instant is beyond even me but he's made his message pretty clear: he's out for blood and is willing to kill anyone who's dumb enough to stand in his way. Hell, he even brazenly murdered some of the strongest gods in existence just to prove that fact. I highly doubt that even I could take him on at this point. And even if I could, how do you think that will make _us_ look? People would know that Vali was in league with us before his little killing spree started, so I wouldn't put it past them to assume that we were probably using him to thin out the competition. This would effectively put a huge target on mine and every other Fallen Angel's back, regardless if they had nothing to do with Vali's little genocide. And you're surely mistaken if you think that Sirzechs or Michael will offer us any sort of aid when shit hits the fan. I wouldn't be surprised if they decided to join kill us off right now just to save their own skins. The fact that they haven't done so already is a god-damn miracle."

"So what are we to do then?" Penemue demanded as her clenched fists began to shake. Whether it was from anger of fear, no one was certain. "Simply wait for our demise if one of the other factions decide to light the metaphorical powder keg that could start another war?"

Azazel closed his eyes and bowed his head in silent thought. Though it was only for a few minutes, it felt like years to Penemue. "For now, we keep this quiet. Only we and a select few know that the power surge came from Vali. The last thing we need are loose lips from our own faction spreading unnecessary rumors. Also go and get someone to investigate what happened to Raynare's group. Whether we want it or not, war is coming and I want all of us to be prepared for when it does. Meanwhile, I'm going to call Sirzechs and Michael and try to explain the situation to them. With any luck, we'll be able to form an alliance of sorts before shit hits the fan. Just do your best to keep this news from spreading and I'll handle the rest."

With a calming breath, the Chief Secretary gave her boss a stiff nod before making her way out of the room to carry out her newly appointed orders.

She sincerely hoped that Azazel knew what he was doing. Otherwise these next few days may very well be last of the entire Fallen Angel race.

* * *

The Multiverse was a truly fascinating concept.

Just about anything and everything a person could imagine could be found within the Multiverse. Infinite universes, realities, dimensions, choices, alternatives, possibilities, there was truly no end when one was able to comprehend its meaning. That's why it was considered _infinite_, because anything and everything was capable of happening within its infinitely vast array of alternate realities. Some were so entirely similar that one could spend millions upon millions of years trying to spot the _slightest_ difference and still never manage to find it. Other were so strikingly _different_ that one could see the differences by just a single glance. Yet each and every one of these realities and universes stood parallel to each other because no matter how different they may be, they were still the same on some fundamental level. It was this very reason why the Multiverse itself was such an interesting theory to many because every day we are filled with the desire to know what _might have_ been, _could have _been, or _should have_ been. Yet sadly to mere mortals and even gods, the concept of alternate universes and realities were just that; a mere theory to all.

All except for _it._

It watched and listened outside the very fabric of time and space; observing the infinite as though it were a mere painting on a metaphorical wall rather than an endless expanse of everything and anything that has, had, or will exist. There was no need for it to observe because it had already done so ever since the Multiverse itself was created, yet it did so anyway. Even though it knew of every single possible outcome and choice down to its smallest atom, it still continued to watch. Not only did it see all, it heard all, felt all, and _was_ all. It may as well have been observing itself because the Multiverse was as much a part of it as it was of the Multiverse. Some might even say that _it_ created itself before even the mere concept of existence came into being.

Yes, it observed. Despite already seeing, knowing, and being all, it still observed nonetheless. Specifically, it observed any realities that managed to gain its interest. And it just so happened that one of these realities had been lucky enough to catch its "eye."

It knew what would happen, of course, from all of the events that would transpire from beginning to end. However, that didn't mean that it wasn't fun to watch a second time, despite the fact that it never showed anything relating to emotions; not because it didn't understand the, but because there was no need for them in the first place. Yet that still didn't stop the anatomical bit of what the mortals of the Multiverse would refer to as "giddiness" as it continued to pay particularly close attention to this specific reality.

If it had lips, it surely would have grinned.

Fun indeed.

Thus the One Above All silently watched and waited as the events of this particular universe continued to play out.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: Here is the rewritten version of Chapter 7. Sorry that it took so long. I've had a real bad case of procrastination and lack of motivation. I'll try to get the next chapter out when I can. Also this story's genres have officially been changed to 'Humor and Horror' so expect a lot more funny and dark shit in this chapter as well as future chapters.**

* * *

**Chapter 7: Putting the 'Fuck' in 'What the Fuck?'**

The main headquarters of the Khaos Brigatde was in ruins.

Hidden deep within the outer territories of the Underworld, the large makeshift camp which had been the main focal point of the terrorist cell's operations was now reduced to nothing but burning cinders. The corpses of creatures and Sacred Gear wielders from every corner of the supernatural world that made up a majority of the camp's population were strewn all over the place. Blood drenched the ground in large puddles and severed body parts were littered around the area, giving the camp the appearance of some kind of hellish waste dump. The few bodies that were fortunate enough to keep all of their parts were either burnt to smoky crisps or impaled on the wooden stakes that made up the surrounding wall of the camp. Human or nonhuman, young or old, not a single soul had managed to escape the carnage. The scent of bloody iron and burnt flesh filled the air while the only source of noise for miles around was the crackling of the many fires that continued to consume the camp in their raging blaze.

A little ways away, a pair of silvery-black eyes surveyed the horrid scene with thinly veiled annoyance.

To say that Ophis was irked was putting it lightly. Though she only conveyed it with a slight narrow of her eyes, deep inside she was highly irritated. It had taken her quite a while to collect this many soldiers for her quest in defeating the Great Red and now she had lost them all in the mere blink of an eye. By no means was she upset in the slightest about their deaths. No matter how powerful or how much potential they had, they were all just pawns to her in the end. They would outlive their usefulness once she had finally succeeded in killing that accursed dragon that had stolen her home away from her. However just because they were pawns didn't mean that she wanted them dead. At least not yet.

No, her annoyance stemmed from the fact that her plans were now set back indefinitely until she somehow managed to gather more warriors for her cause. There was no way she would be able to kill that damned dragon now that her subordinates were reduced to bloody and burnt pieces.

Speaking of dragons…

Ophis set her annoyed gaze on the other figure floating no more than ten feet away from her. Clad in shining white draconian armor along with a pair of large blue wings protruding from his back, the figure removed his helmet, reveling the smirking face of a young man with hair as white as his armor.

"Vali." Ophis said in an emotionless tone. Her black eyes narrowed further as she closed the distance between them. "Explain yourself. Why did you kill them?"

"Oh, no reason in particular." The half devil shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. "I simply wished to see if any of these worthless pissants could offer me a challenge. Cleary I was wrong. I must say I'm disappointed Ophis. I thought you only chose the best of the best. Obviously your so-called 'best' weren't ever good enough in the first place."

If Ophis was angered at all by Vali's mocking comment she didn't show it. Instead she was staring intently into his eyes which were dark purple in color. "Your power…" she said slowly, almost hesitantly. "It has increased exponentially yet for some reason I cannot sense it. What has happened to you?"

"Nothing that concerns you, Ouroboros." Vali waved his hand dismissively. "Let's just say that I've received a major upgrade that has allowed me to reach new heights. Heights that I fully intend to climb further if I ever hope to become the strongest being in the universe."

The blatant declaration almost made Ophis shake her head in exasperation. If there was one thing she absolutely despised about Vali Lucifer, it was his constant boasts about becoming stronger than anyone else. At first it was simply a minor annoyance but now he was starting to sound like a broken record.

"So I assume you still plan on helping me slay the Idiot Red?" While his sudden increase in power was still an enigma, Ophis found that she couldn't really care less where or how he got. So long as he used that power to help her kill Great Red then nothing else mattered.

Vali scoffed as if he were offended by her question. "Obviously. It was be a tremendous waste to _not_ use this power to slay the Dragon of Dragons itself. Though before I do there are others I plan of killing as well."

Ophis frowned, not at all pleased with his answer. "Who could be more important than Baka Red?" she asked.

"I wouldn't go far as to say they're more important. Merely warmups for me to hone my abilities. I already slaughtered the entire Greek Pantheon. Who's to say that I shouldn't try going for the Hindu or Egyptian Pantheons next? Or maybe all of the Three Factions?"

"I fail to see why it is necessary for you to 'warm up' if you were able to wipe out the Olympians. They were one of – if not – the strongest pantheon in the entire supernatural world. Furthermore, I fail to see why any of the other pantheons or the factions take priority over killing Retard Red."

"Patience, Ophis." Vali let out an amused chuckle. "What fun is there in going straight for the main boss when there are so many sub-bosses for me to kill along the way?"

"I have spent plenty of time waiting, Vali." Ophis' childlike voice became deeper as her already black eyes somehow managed to darken further. The atmosphere around them became heavy as a black aura surrounded the Ouroboros Dragon's small body. "I have waited countless millennia trying to get that insufferable Red out of the Dimensional Gap and refuse to waste another second just so you can go screw around with this newfound power of yours. If you will not do as I ask then I shall dispose of you myself and find someone who _will_."

Despite the overwhelming pressure that surrounded the two, Vali didn't appear to be the least bit phased. Instead, the smirk on his face was replaced with a full blown grin. "I welcome to see you try, Ouroboros. Don't forget that without my help your chances of defeating Great Red are practically zero. Especially with you being as weak as you are now. Make no mistake, I fully intend on killing Great Red once I've done away with all of the other stronger beings that plague the earth. Once they're gone I'll gladly run my fist through that dragon's beating heart. This I swear as the White Dragon Emperor."

Before Ophis could say anything more, a bright white glow enveloped Vali before he shot off into the sky like a fired bullet. A second later his entire form disappeared in the horizon in a soft blink of light.

Ophis' small lips slightly twitched. If one were to look hard enough they could see the faintest trace of a scowl developing on her near emotionless face. Her annoyance from before doubled in its intensity.

She honestly didn't know why she even bothered keeping the troublesome half devil around. The boy clearly showed no concern for anything except for the constant need to prove he was the strongest. While not nearly as overbearing in arrogance like those of the Old Satan Faction, his overconfidence was still suffocating to listen to. And that boy had the gall to make her wait even longer just so he could go gallivanting off into the sunset with that power of his.

If the Khaos Brigade's camp hadn't already been destroyed, Ophis was sure she would've vaporized it for the sole purpose of venting her growing annoyance.

With nothing else for her here, Ophis opened a rift in space before disappearing through it. She may not have complete control over Vali but luckily for her she had been able to find two new individuals who may just be able to help her achieve her ultimate goal as well as deal with Vali if he proved to be a threat in the future.

And who better to put down a dragon emperor than his rival, along with a dragon king on top of it?

* * *

**Issei's Album of Badassery**

**Now Playing **_**"Wow" **_**by Post Malone**

* * *

_Said she's tired of lil' money, need a big boy_

_Pull up twenty inch blades like I'm Lil' Troy_

_Now it's everybody flockin', need a decoy_

_Shawty mixing up the vodka with the liquor, yeah._

Saji grimaced as he listened to the music emanating from Issei's phone. "Why the hell are we listening to this American crap?

"Because unlike the musicians here, theirs don't consist of nothing but prepubescent boy bonds or female singers that sound like deflating chew toys." Issei replied simply and he and Saji walked down the sidewalk with their schoolbags in hand. "And don't even get me started on their porn. One can only listen to the helium-induced orgasms that most Japanese women seem to make so many times without going crazy. I mean have you ever listened to a Japanese woman cum? It gets so high that it's physically impossible to jerk off to without it becoming a massive cringe fest."

"TMI, Hyoudou. TMI."

"Hey, you asked. Not my fault most of the women here can't moan for shit."

_G-Wagon, G-Wagon, G-Wagon, G-Wagon_

_All the housewives pullin' up_

_I got a lot of toys, 720-S bumpin' Fall Out Boy_

Saji shook his head at his friend's bizarre attitude, though deep down he reluctantly agreed that the one song was already better than most of the so-called "music" that was made in their country. Seriously though, why was it that most Japanese music consisted of nothing but gaudy preteens trying to get their quick fifteen minutes of fame?

"Though at least the women here don't need to pump themselves with gallons of Botox just to make themselves look decent." Issei took a swig of water from the bottle he was carrying before continuing his rant. "I mean practically half the women in this country are naturally well-endowed and those that aren't are still total babes to look at! Pretty much all the girls at our school are absolute hotties and not a single one of them have implants!"

_You was talkin' shit in the beginning_

_Back when I was feelin' more forgivin' (More forgivin')_

_I know it piss you off to see me winnin' (See me)_

_See the igloo in my mouth and I be grinnin' (I be grinnin')_

Saji found the he couldn't refute that statement either no matter how ludicrous it sounded. There was indeed _a lot_ of women in Japan who were 'Au Naturel' in the beauty department. Especially for girls such as Shitori-kaicho and Shinra-sempai.

'_Not to mention Issei's mom.' _A stream of blood threatened to shoot out of Saji's nose at the thought of his friend's bombshell of a mother. Seriously, how the hell did a pervert like Issei have such a smoking hot mom?!

"Speaking of absolute hotties," Said pervert's voice shook him out of his thoughts as the brunette gave Saji a mischievous and wiggle of his eyebrows. "You planning on groping Shinra-sempai's bodacious rack during school again?

"S-Shut the hell up, Hyoudou!" Saji barked with a heated face. He did _not_ want to be constantly reminded of the sheer embarrassing moment. Even though it had eventually led to the two of them to becoming friends, it was still a pain to remember. Even if the feeling of Student Council Vice President's breasts in his hands had been nothing short of spectacular.

"You know if you ask nicely, I _could_ just make her clothes disappear so you could grope more than just her breasts. In fact, I could even do the same to Shitori-kaicho if you wish."

Despite the fact that his friend's suggestion was borderline rape, it still didn't stop the torrent of blood that shot out of his nose like a geyser. Nor did it stop the howling laughter that escaped Issei's lips as he tumbled to the ground while clutching at his sides.

_Hundred bands in my pocket it's on me_

_Hundred deep when I roll like the army_

_Get more bottles, these bottles are lonely_

_It's a moment when I show up, got 'em sayin' "Wow"_

* * *

When the boys had finally reached the school grounds, both had departed with a wave of their hands and a simple "See you later" before heading off to their respective classrooms.

Issei once again found himself on the receiving end of multiple glares as soon as he entered his classroom; all of which he pointedly ignored as he headed straight for his desk and planted himself down on his seat where he proceeded to lean back and enjoy the relatively peaceful silence that enveloped the entire room like fog.

Besides one or two hushed conversations here and there, he noticed with some amusement how almost none of the other students were talking or even looking at each other. No doubt the 'incident' from a few days ago was still fresh on everyone's minds. He barely suppressed a snicker as he caught the sight of all of his female classmates doing their utmost to remain as small as possible in their seats. Not a single one of them moved more than an inch or made the slightest sound. Instead they kept their gazes locked firmly on their desks or straight ahead on the whiteboard whilst seemingly ignoring everything and everyone around them.

A few more minutes of tense silence passed by before the morning bell finally rung, signaling the beginning of class. Not a few seconds later their teacher stiffly entered the class before setting his things on his desk and proceeded to take rollcall.

"Akira Shimizu…"

"Here."

"Aoyama Takahiro…"

"Here."

It should be noted that he never once looked up at any of the students since the second he came into the classroom. No doubt the 'incident' was also still very fresh in his memory as well.

Issei bit the inside of his cheek and quickly leaned down on his desk to bury his face in the crook of his arm, trying his damnedest to not burst into another fit of hysterical laughter.

However the idea that suddenly popped into his head nearly made him lose all self-control right then and there.

With his arm still covering his quivering mouth, Issei carefully reached into his pocket and grasped the stone firmly in his other hand. Knowing full well what was about to happen, he bit his tongue and braced himself as best he could. The stone soon vibrated with power as he let his imagination roam free.

_FWOOSH!_

The teacher's voice, as well as any other sound within the classroom came to a screeching halt.

Nobody in the school would know what occurred until a random faculty member was reported to the room for a noise complaint. Said complaint was due to every student in the class rolling on the floor in tearful hysterics. The reason for their laughter was not the teacher, who had once again passed out onto the floor, but was instead the large, three foot-long vibrating dildo that was suspicious placed where the man's desk had just been moments before. The sight was so mindboggling that the faculty member didn't know whether to call for an ambulance or join their students in their hysterical fits.

Regardless, the man promptly handed in his resignation letter as soon as he regained consciousness a few minutes later.

* * *

**(Saji's classroom a few moments earlier.)**

"…well-established clans such as the Takeda and Imagawa, who had ruled under the authority of both the Kamakura and Muromachi, were able to expand their spheres of influence."

Even for an average student like Saji, he could say with full confidence that he was _not _paying attention at all to what his teacher was saying at the moment. Rather, he was paying more attention to his teacher in general than to what she way saying.

…More particularly to the fact that the shirt she was currently wearing looked extra tight around the chest region. And considering how most of the other male students looked like they weren't paying attention either, he could assume that he wasn't the only one who was getting an eyeful.

He couldn't help it though. Even though he wasn't as nearly as big of a pervert as Issei was and actually did his best to hide his quell his perverse tendencies, he couldn't deny that he was still a hot-blooded male who liked like his fair share of good-looking women as much as the next guy. Especially if said women were very well-endowed in the right areas and wore tight clothing.

The fact that his teacher, Tsukishima-sensei, just happened to be one of these well-endowed women made it – and him – _extremely _hard to concentrate. It didn't help at all that the tight business suit she was wearing not only showed off the outline of her large and generous breasts but also let out a substantial amount of cleavage for practically the whole world to see made him wonder just how exactly he was able to pass the class at all. Sure he had noticed how hot she was before but he never really focused on her enough to _really_ notice until today.

'_Damnit. I'm hanging out with Issei too much.' _Saji thought with a curse as he tried to focus on the lesson that was being given. However his eyes once again began to wander and he couldn't help but admire how slender his teacher's stocking-clad legs were. It didn't help that her skirt was also quite short. _'Really makes a guy wonder if she's got some thick thighs-SONOVABITCH! FUCK YOU, ISSEI! IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU THAT I'M LIKE THIS!' _

With a groan, Saji slammed his head down on his desk, gathering the attention of the rest of the class.

"Is there a problem, Genshirou-san?" His teacher asked with narrowed eyes. Her strict and no-nonsense attitude, while scary to some, was just another thing that added to her hotness level for Saji.

Rubbing the front of his head, Saji sent her an embarrassed grin. "Just didn't get enough sleep, Sensei. I apologize for my rude interruption."

"Well see to it that it doesn't happen again unless you want to spend the rest of the day in detention." She reprimanded with a harsh glare before continuing on with her lecture.

Ignoring the hushed snickers from some of the other students, Saji settled for resting his head in his hand while absentmindedly twirling his pencil on his desk. Though it wasn't very long until his eyes wandered down to the outline of his female instructor's curvaceous backside that was plainly visible through her tight skirt.

"_You planning on groping Shinra-sempai's bodacious rack during school again?"_

Issei's words from earlier felt like poison in his mind, though try as he might, he could no longer deny that he was very eager to grope _something_, or should he say _someone_. Though who he had in mind was most definitely not Shinra-sempai.

_**{If you have any self-respect whatsoever, my Other Self, you will not reduce yourself to Ddraig's idiotic host's level.}**_

The dragon's words fell on deaf ears as Saji reached into his pocket and grasped the stone that resided within.

_**{Ddraig was right. Why do I even bother anymore?}**_

"Sorry, Vritra."

The stone hummed and the world instantly stopped.

"But I can't really find myself to care right now."

Getting up out of his seat, the blonde walked through the rows of frozen students until he was directly in front of Tsukishima-sensei, who stood completely still with one arm outstretched towards the board while the other held a book.

The sight of her partially uncovered magnanimous breasts no more than a few inches away from him was burned into his mind. Nothing else mattered at that moment as Saji reached up with shaking hands and proceeded to _squeeze_. Even with his fingers fully outstretched, there was still more than enough bouncy flesh that wasn't within his grasp. They were literally too much for him to handle.

He knew what he was doing was wrong on so many levels. He knew that he was basically molesting his teacher at the moment. Yet no matter how hard the moral side of him tried to argue, he still never released his tight grip on his teacher's gravity-defying bosom.

At least he wasn't bored in class anymore.

* * *

"YOU GRABBED TSUKISHIMA-SENSEI'S-"

A hand was promptly slapped over Issei's mouth before he had a chance to finish his sentence.

"HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF THE PHRASE 'LOOSE LIPS SINK SHIPS', YOU FUCKING MORON?!"

"MMPH!" With some effort, Issei was soon able to wrestle himself out of Saji's grasp. However a few seconds hadn't even passed by before he suddenly seized the blonde by the hem of his shirt and brought him face-to-face. "How the fuck do you expect me to keep quiet when you just told me you groped one of, if not, _the_ hottest teachers in the entire school?!"

"Shut up! If anything it's your damn fault for influencing me with your perverted tendencies!" Saji pushed the brunette off him before sliding down to the ground and burying his head I his hands with a loud groan. "I swear I don't know why I even hang out with you. One of these days I fear I'm going to end up as big of a pervert as you."

_**{You say that as though you aren't already.}**_

"Shut the fuck up, Vritra. Don't even start with me right now." Rubbing his head, Saji glared back at his "friend" who had taken a seat across from him. "You are _so_ lucky nobody comes up hear during lunch or I would have thrown your ass over the ledge. I may not be popular but I still have somewhat of a reputation to keep."

As soon as morning classes had ended, the two dragon holders had met up on the school roof for their lunch period. No sooner had Saji gotten through the door did Issei begin telling him of the little "escapade" during his class period. Saji was not ashamed to admit that the pervert's tale had caused him to shoot a stream of water out of his nose in a fit of hysterics. However his laughter immediately died as soon as Issei asked him of what he had done during his class. Although very reluctant to do so, partly because of extreme embarrassment and because the reaction he knew he would receive from the pervert, Saji eventually informed Issei of what he had done.

Needless to say, he wasn't surprised in the least that the pervert almost seemed to have a stroke as soon as he heard what Saji had done. Though he was shocked that Issei had almost screamed it out loud. Truly, he really had been lucky that no one had been around to hear. He hadn't been joking earlier. He really would have killed Issei and not have last a wink of sleep over it. As far as his reputation goes, as mediocre as it was, Issei was expendable.

"I still can't believe that you got Kawarama-sensei to quit his teaching job. Especially with a _dildo_ of all things." Saji had to clasp his mouth in order to stop the laughter that threatened to escape. Just the imagining the scenario that must have taken place was enough to make his ribs ache. He probably would've died from lack of oxygen if he had been there to witness it in person.

"It wasn't what I intended to do but hey." Issei shrugged as he took a bite of his sandwich. "Hopefully they'll replace him with someone who isn't half as boring as he was. Hopefully a drop-dead sexy and gorgeous woman with a strict business-like personality and huge boobs. You know, kind of like Tsukishima-sensei." Issei wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at Saji, who responded by splashing a bit of water from his water bottle over Issei's face. "Hey! Unless you're a woman keep your liquids to yourself!"

"Are you capable of thinking about anything that _doesn't_ involve sex or women in general?" Saji asked incredulously.

_**[As someone who's been sealed inside this degenerate since the day of his birth and has been unfortunate enough to hear every thought and see every mental image that passes through his head, I can say no, he cannot.]**_

"Wait, _every time_?" Issei's face mysteriously became white as a sheet. "So every time I watched porn or stared at a woman's tits or thought about any female naked-"

_**[YES, partner. Every. Single. Time.]**_

"…Oh."

An awkward silence enveloped the two.

"…You going to eat that?"

* * *

"Oh mysterious glowing rock~. How much I love you~."

Pulling his pants back up around his hips, Freed gave the yellow stone a sloppy wet kiss before pocketing it and giving it a few light taps. He then proceeded to fasten the buckle on his belt before redressing himself in his priest robes. Looking himself in the mirror, he made sure to straighten his clothes out and brush off any accumulated dust before giving himself his best non-manic smile. Once he was sure he was sure his for was in peak condition he clasped his arms behind his back and looked over at the nearby bed where his two new "toys" were situated. Both of them were laying bare naked with their legs spread and were covered head-to-toe in bruises and cuts and were drenched with sweat. A mix of blood and semen flowed out of their swollen cunts and dribbled onto the bedsheets. Their frizzled hair was sprawled all over the place and partially covered their unfocused and glazed over eyes that stared up at the ceiling with empty gazes. Their mouths hung partially open with more bits of semen dripping from their chapped lips. Both of their moderately-sized breasts were littered with hickeys while their rosy and still hardened nipples were covered in bite marks. Overall, it looked as though both teens had been fucked and abused into a coma. They were alive, but just barely thanks to the insatiable appetite of the rogue priest.

He had to admit that he didn't remember the last time he had such good pussy, especially ones that belonged to human women. Sure Kalawarner and Raynare had both the pussy and the tits to die for but that was expected given the fact that they were Fallen Angels, and everyone knew that female Fallen Angels were practically built for seduction and sex. Human women however were wild cards. Freed could count on one hand the amount of times where sex with a human woman was actually enjoyable. Unfortunately, their bodies weren't as nearly alluring as an Angel or even a Devil's, much as it made him physically sick to admit the last part. However it seemed that he had been able to strike metaphorical gold with these two because as soon as he got them into bed, he hadn't been able to stop pounding their tight pussies until the sun began to rise. The fact that they were still virgins just made it all the more enjoyable.

Stepping out of the bedroom, Freed clapped his hand together and soon his three Fallen Angel sluts appeared before him like a dogs standing at attention before their master. None of them had a single piece of clothing on except for the tight black leather collars that adorned each of their necks. Inscribed on each of the collars were vulgar and demeaning nicknames for each of the Angels: 'Cock Sleeve' for Raynare, 'Glory Hole' for Kalawarner, and 'Ball Gag' for Mittelt.

"Listen up, sluts!" Freed jovially announced. "I'm going out for a bit so I want this room absolutely spotless!" He gestured towards the two girls. "Also, be sure to give my new toys a nice bath while you're at it! I plan on having more fun with them later and I hate used meat so be sure to scrub them really good or I'll flog your supple asses until you won't be able to sit for the rest of your pathetic lives!"

The three Angels turned slaves gave the priest a low bow followed by an emotionless, "Hai, Freed-sama."

Smiling in satisfaction, Freed gave each of his pets a pat on the head before leaving them to their duties. As soon as he stepped out of the church, he took a huge whiff of fresh air before his smile lost its generosity and slowly became more feral.

"Time to raise some hell."

* * *

"Thank you both for meeting me on such short notice."

In an undisclosed location within the Underworld, three figures sat around a table. The first was Azazel, the proclaimed leader of the Fallen Angel faction as well as the organizer of this small get-together.

On his left was a handsome young man with long flowing red hair that reached below his neck along with a pair of clear turquoise eyes. The man was outfitted in ornate and exquisite looking armor on top of a dark silk robe. His clear eyes which practically glowed in the darkened room stared back at Azazel and the other occupant with a look of uncertainty and thinly veiled hostility, though the hostility was mostly focused on Azazel.

The other occupant was another handsome young man who was, quite literally, _glowing._ Not only because of the light that surrounded his entire body but also because he looked as though he were sculpted from the hands of the Almighty Himself, which in fact he _was_. His long blonde hair that reached below his necks shined just as bright as the light that surrounded him and his skin was clearer than any of the earth's oceans without a single blemish or scratch in sight. He was dressed in a brightly colored robe that looked as though it were crafted from the finest silks imaginable while a small halo made completely out of light adorned the top of his head. His equally bright green eyes regarded his two companions with the same amount of uncertainty though unlike his red haired counterpart, there was no malice behind his gaze even when it flickered to his fallen "brother."

Seeing both sets of eyes on his person, Azazel cleared his throat and clasped his hands together. "I'm sure you're both aware of the recent events that have taken place?"

"You mean the White Dragon Emperor laying waste to the entire Greek Pantheon? The very same Dragon Emperor who was under _your _care?" The accusation coming from the red haired man was as blunt as a hammer while the pressure in the room slightly increased along with the hostility in his tone.

"Also the same Dragon Emperor who has been reported destroying numerous Khaos Birgade hideouts as well as causing mayhem and wanton destruction amongst the other factions and pantheons." Even his brother's soft and tranquil voice held a slight edge to it.

Azazel, however, remained perfectly poised with his arms crossed in a calm manner despite the obvious overwhelming tension that threatened to consume him whole. "I am fully aware of the shit that Vali has officially slung at us. However I want to assure you both that I had absolutely nothing to do with his spontaneous murder spree. Hell, I don't even know how he was able to get enough strength to take on a God, let alone an entire pantheon."

"You seriously expect us to believe that he not only attacked but single-handedly _massacred _one of the strongest religious pantheons in existence on nothing more than a simple whim?" The Devil leader raised an incredulous eyebrow towards the fallen angel and only received a simple shrug in response.

"The little shit's had a hard-on for battle for practically his entire life. Always went on and on about defeating the strongest the world had to offer until he came out at the very top. It was actually kinda cute at first until he started growing up and became more overconfident with every fight he won. After that I thought it was just the words of an arrogant teenager who was overcompensating for the lack of women he never seemed to be interested in." The blonde man sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in irritation. "I knew that he could be out of control at time but I never thought he'd actually be stupid enough to pull something like this."

"And now we are at the very brink of starting another Great War." The sheer absurdity of it all made Michael shake his head. "Just when we were working so hard to end conflict once and for all." His droopy eyes and hurt tone of voice gave him the impression of a man who had just lost everything dear to him in a single instant, which wouldn't be that far off given the position he was in.

"Something has to be done about this immediately," Sirzechs exclaimed as he set his hard stare back onto Azazel. "Many of the other pantheons and religious factions have already started securing their borders and arming their fiercest warriors in preparations for any other attacks. Luckily we haven't heard of anything major other than the occasional scuffle here and there but I don't expect this standoff to last for much longer. The loss of the Greek Pantheon has left a tremendous power vacuum that others will not hesitate to claim for themselves should the opportunity present itself. The only reason no other faction has made any major moves as of late it because they know it will only result in an all-out war, only this time it will be a war of total attrition."

"I suppose we must prepare ourselves as well," Michael reluctantly put in. "We do not know when or where the next attack may commence but I do not want us to be caught off-guard when it does. Which is why I propose that we unite our factions into one alliance in order to strengthen our odds of survival. If there is still the slightest chance to bring peace between our separate factions then I can think of no other solution than fighting together as one for the betterment of our future."

"Of that, you'll hear no complaints from me!" Azazel jovially chimed in as he laid back in his chair with his hands clasped behind his head.

"Azazel." Said man suppressed a shiver as Sirzechs' eyes narrowed dangerously into his. "Don't forget that we are only in this mess because you couldn't keep your protégé in line. Because of his extremely reckless actions he has officially turned the entire supernatural world into a ticking time bomb that can explode at any given second. Something _must_ be done before he has a chance to escalate this violence further."

"I know, I know." Even someone as seemingly uncaring as him couldn't ignore the gravity of situation. "If push comes to shove I'll hunt down the brat myself and drag him back by his feet if I have to. And I know that I have no right to ask this but I would be grateful to both of you if you didn't kill him. Vali may be an idiotic, battle-crazed, asexual virgin with little-to-no regard for those around him but I'm still hoping that I can try and resolve this issue without any more blood being spilled. Especially the blood of a kid that I basically had to raise on my own."

"You mean to tell us that you actually care for the boy as more than just as asset to you and the rest of our fallen siblings?" Michael asked. His eyes wide surprise and puzzlement. "I was under the impression that such feelings were alien to you, brother."

"Don't forget that I was once a pure Angel too, Mickey." Azazel said with a lopsided grin, though his voice contained a hint of melancholy if one were to listen hard enough. "And what can I say? Even I've grown somewhat attached to him over the years."

* * *

The school bell rang late into the afternoon, once again signaling another end to a day of learning – or torture depending on who you asked. All of the students filed out of their classrooms and hastily made their way out through the school's main gate, all eager to return home after a long day of continuous studies. However none were as eager to exit the premises as the two local dragon containers who all but dashed and dodged through the crowded hallways and outside of the school grounds; both very much anxious to put as much distance between the school and themselves as quickly as possible.

"Finally!" Issei shouted as he enthusiastically pumped his fist into the air. "I thought the day would never end! I mean how the hell anybody could sit on their ass and do nothing but stare at a book for hours on end is beyond me! Oh sweet freedom, how I've missed you so!" As if to express his gratitude to the outside world, Issei got on his knees and dramatically started kissing the pavement, gaining weird looks and hasty retreats from those who were passing by at the time.

"Pull yourself together, dumbass." Saji grumbled in annoyance as he delivered a swift kick to Issei's backside, earning a surprised yelp from the boy as he fell face-first onto the ground. "Unlike you, some of us actually want to get into good Universities. If you actually bothered trying to get good grades instead of fantasizing about breasts all day then maybe school would be a bit more enjoyable."

"NOT FANTASIZE ABOUT BREASTS?!" In the time it took Saji to blink, Issei was already off the pavement and was gaping at him as if he had just committed the most heinous crime in existence. "HERESY! BLASHPEMY! OFF WITH YOUR HEAD! SO LONG AS I LIVE THERE WILL _NEVER_ BE A TIME WHERE THE BEAUTY OF A WOMAN'S BODACIOUS BOSOM ENTERS THE DEEPEST CREVICES OF MY MIND! BOOBS ARE THE SINGLE GREATEST GIFT GOD BESTOWED UPON US LOWLY MORTALS AND ARE MEANT TO BE TREASURED AS SUCH UNTIL THE VERY END OF TIME. HOW SOMEONE LIKE YOU COULD SAY SUCH A THING IS A SIN THAT SHALL NEVER BE FORGIVEN! YOUR HEAR THAT, SAJI GENSHIROU?! _I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR TARNISHING THE HOLY TREASURES THAT ARE BREASTS! NEVER!_"

"…"

"Mommy? What is that guy saying? Are boobs really that great?"

"Hello? 9-1-1? Yes, I'd like to report a possible rapist…"

"SHIT! QUICKLY, SAJI! RETREAT!"

The blonde didn't even attempt to put up any kind of resistance as he was seized by the arm and forcibly dragged down the road. He ultimately decided that he was too tired for anymore shit that day.

None of the boys ever took notice of a small bat-like creature sitting completely out of place on a nearby telephone pole, watching them with significantly intelligent eyes until they both disappeared around the corner.

* * *

A cloudless night sky soon swept over all of Kuoh a few hours later, giving the bustling town below a clear and very rare view of the hundreds upon thousands of shining stars that polka-dotted the endless black void of space like diamond-encrusted canvass. Those who still happened to be awake this late into the night were treated with a gorgeous sight that one would only see somewhere far away from the smog and pollution of civilization. However if one were to take a closer look through a telescope they would see one of these thousands of stars getting noticeably brighter until it seemingly plummeted straight through the earth's atmosphere like a bullet shot out of a gun and burned like a lit candle. The object continued its blazing decent towards the earth until it crash landed in a deserted field on the outskirts of Kuoh in a small controlled explosion.

Once the dust and debris settled and the surrounding fire died down, the still-smoking object was revealed to be a small rock the size of a bowling ball that was all but shattered at the seams due to the intensity of the impact. However it wasn't long before a dark red sludge-like substance began slithering its way out of the burning rock and disappeared within the nearby tall grass; its destination being the small town no more than a few miles ahead.


End file.
